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Nikita Zulauf Feb 2015
Dad
The rough texture of your palms Lingers on my fingertips.
Your enchanting laugh rings in my ears.
You were my protecter.
My hero.
It was far to soon for u to Hang up your cape.
5 longs years spiral out of control in a matter of days.
Feeling Your smile fading in my eyes hour by hour. I begged for your life.
But god turned his back on my selfish pleas.
I am told it all happens for a reason, But I can find no reasoning in a father being torn from his family far before his time.
Cancer doesn't rip apart familys for a reason.
Daughters arnt ment to watch there father slip away for a reason.
I would have sold my soul for one last hug, To hear your voice agian.
My father stolen from me by The venom that corsed in his veins.
Life is to fickle to appreciate. But I sware if I could have had one last phone call I could renue my lust to live. I could step out of this seemingly endless revolving door.
With you gone the house is Hallow.
We are Hallow.
You left us frightfully stumbling through a mirror maze.
You were the light to guide me home. But I am left a shell of a daughter craving for one more minute Of life in you.
I see You in my dreams, A moment of comfort in your presence that leaves me bitter an hurt when I wake.
I write to you everyday knowing there just words lost in the wind.
You sculpted me into a broken masterpiece and left me unfinished.
Left a hole in me that can never seem to be filled.
Well u laid in the hospital bed with the cold cloth i had placed on your head i felt as tho i was a young child agian longing to crawl up in your lap an have you tell me everytging was going to be ok.
My tears seem Dried  an i cant kick start my heart.
The lights on life dimmed by your absence.
Everywhere i turn i see you.
Raw an open, I miss you So much words could not descride.
Please.
Please.
Come home daddy
I lost my father to cancer this year and for me writing about it has really helped me move forward
Heavy Hearted Mar 2024
H    is for help! you know I'm alive
E    for estranged, expressionistics
        contrive
R    eading rhymes- revise, review
        reprise, recite- rethink and renue.
O    verwhelming-
        vertly, overdone-
         bsessive...
o  ntology~
      
Still, I'm the one.
I'm the hero, of the story-
Don't need to be saved.
No one's got it all

"I aint no Cinderella, I aint waitin on no prince to save me in fact until now I think I been doing just fine- you think I sell my body? I merely sell my time."
Heavy Hearted Mar 2024
Life is complex, she said to me
A statement unfortunately true,
Reiterating the fact, real happiness
Has become a fleeting virtue.
The single most excruciating task
Of anyone to ever, have to ask-
Is to live this life, so full of pain
As the human race, itselve's disdain
Yet, its as effortless as drawing breath
The simplicity of air
Our automatic processes
That which contagiously, we share:
Laughter, Heartache, Hatred, Hope-
the humanistic ways to cope.

Despite that complexities insue,
You know strength, to let faith renue
Bestow some courage, place belief
In all that initially brings you grief

Every morning, a new dawn's shining-
& every cloud, has it's silver lining.
Heavy Hearted Nov 2023
I speak the name of My god over you
inspite of sorrow,
doubted belief...

I'll nurture your virtue.
I speak these words of power-  to renue;
In desperation, I may plead

The divine to restore you.

I speak these words, to petition the unknown;
omniscient or indifferent
I plead they lead you home.

I speak a poem that doesn't rhyme aloud
Reciting prayers,
still holding on
and on
     and on.

— The End —