would what that be junior? senior? sophomore?

since this brother in law rarely emails,
     ye may scrunch countenance puzzled,
     or on verge of emitting flatulence,
     that if a ripper got let loose (by Jack),

     would possibly find ja propelled,
     thru Edgar Allan Poe's churchly
     sepulchral tintinnabulation
     (where for greater effect

     yukon envision imagistic ravenous bats
     in belfry resonating air,
or perhaps blasted back
     to the House of the rising sun),

     BUT...gnome hatter,
     no win tent may starkly appear
explaining inexplicable reasonable rhyme,
     why aye dash communique

    minus virtual trumpeting blare
(sorry, but in the interest
     of belated birthday cheer,
without computer generated imagery)

     rendered hoop fully readable,
     sans black and white Scottish matted pixels
constituting beloved appellation
     unsure how to address ye perfectly clear

while sitting atop padded office chair,
pondering as already writ,
     how to acknowledge thee, whither with dear...
meanwhile, this scribe experiences

     comfortably numb derriere,
now scrambling, resorting, and toying
     to fetch acceptable, catchy light hearted endear
mint, that seems tolerably acceptable

     (of course) with flair
acutely perceptive, though NOT overboard with glare
ring obeisance, NOR USE ALL CAPS
     TO SCREAM so ye kin hear  

soap hull ease excuse this incurable
     Harris scribe with thinning heir
yes...oye gevalt, infantile regression finds me
     burrowed in Schwenksville, Pennsylvania lair

still emotionally inchoate, though grown a mere
speck within the flotsam and jetsam near
to boyhood Collegeville abode NOT saved by a prayer
re: home companion bachelor Norwegian farmer

replaced instead by vinyl city
     all in the name of progress
which (once a pawn a time)
     open farmland did dis app pear

so...a gam bulling gambit
     to avoid moseying down Level Road...
may NOT seem queer
for insufferable sadness

     with eyes bursting with many a tear...
(gulp) tis best to veer
away from topic uh viz er rated razed homestead,
     and mainly wish ye another birth year!

adieu...from math tha hue

How ideal to luxuriate
supposed divine right frill
maximizing climate control
with matter of fact bravado
creature comfort pang to fulfill
consequent flagrant portent

to exercise freewill
beware controlled environment
pays hefty bill
cracking heat as
temperature gets chill
cumulative destructive

ecological footprints generated,
thus advisable to swallow
figuratively bitter pill,
herewith suggested
binary/digital quill,
cuz unchecked energy

consumption will
necessitate fossil fuels
subjected to frack and drill
invariably contribute
render moot no rhyme
or reason for Jack and Jill

to hastily clamber uphill
fetching pail of possibly
tainted, ruined, polluted... water
evidenced courtesy eutrophication
algal blooms, decimated krill
aquatic flora and fauna stockstill

meaning... untenable for life
perhaps percolating, spewing, zapping...
seepage from landfill
nsync with detritus
many industries spill,
not necessarily directly

linkedin to cranking thermostat until
warmth ideal for barenaked ladies,
who cavort, frolic,
viz yule eyes imagistic poetic skill
veritably lighting boathouse row
reflections shimmering, scintillating,

glistening off Schuylkill
deceptive brilliant appearance
unsafe toxic drinking water courtesy mill
yens flowing electrons to power
industrial secretes no longer confidential
public knowledge and awareness critical

to stem tide allowing, enabling,
and providing juice to sustain treadmill
ever faster rat race pace of life cozily housing
**** sapiens hermetically sealed against
extreme temperatures,

ye must adapt experiencing chill
bundling layers of clothes -
case in point yours truly,
who also keeps windows ajar
refreshing brisk air lungs to fill.

Unbeknownst to any
     innocent onlooker, aye
underwent extreme internal
     torture with silent cry
ying whimpers, whence,
     (either left or

     right) post-
     pubescent myopic eye
didst readily espy,
     an aesthetically pleasing female,
     and most likely stunning
     to any other generic guy

and suddenly rendered mute, NO...,
     NOT even daring
     enough to say "hi,"
which close proximity of sizzling
     hot babe wrought me fancying
     myself being whisked away

     (in a one horse
     open sleigh, despite
     the remote possibility livingsocial
in Montgomery County,
Pennsylvania suburban) igloo
     to be frozen

     with fear, petrified lo'
     while terror seized thee Oh No
bliss oblige emotional status quo
of much younger Matthew
Scott Harris head to toe
     induced a deplorable woe

imaging other (prospective
     obscured individuals) probably
considered yours truly
     tubby unstrung mama's yoyo,
and at this present time feline
     less in timid

     dated noticing a sultry,
     leggy, and foxy anatomical
     and physiological arrest
ting, though such hypothetical chest
a coy gal, nonchalantly, innocently


     with non verbal expressed
     charm and demurely
     posing as if intending
     to serve as guest
of honor, nonetheless,
     this brief illusory invest

ment, sans quasi
     voyeuristic poetic, shrug jest
sheen, and imagistic distraction,
     thy sole rhythmical
     motif, since n'er nest
sold with any

     purdy young thang begrudging
     natural animalistic proclivity,
     which absence young adult quest
ting, oh yea
     definitely in apropos now,
yet...that self deprived

     self discovery stage of life,
     that "smarts" me psyche,
     when clumsy teen
     age dating experience,
     a electric kool
     aid acid (litmus) test
until twilight age
     senescence doth wrest.