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I know what I am,
I know who I am,
But I am not sure who I am,
Or what I am,
They call me Black,
I do not know if I am Black,
They call me African,
But am I African,
Where these names came from,
I wonder,
Maybe they are just nicknames,
Yes,
Fom those historical enermies who were up to degrade me,
I do not know who I am,
But I know for sure I'm just a poor millionaire,
Poor in Western materialistic classification,
I know I am Umuntu,
A millionaire Umuntu,
Rich in Ubuntu,
But that's not all,
I'm in search of my identity,
I need to know who the hell I am,
For I am black and African,
But I'm neither Black
Nor African.
nichole r Nov 2014
-
crisp pages
indented fom my pen's point,
whisper beneath the dry skin
of my cracked palm.
they flutter together,
butterfly wings,
and weave together a time
so melodious.
If you can't see,
How can you expect to be free,
Sitting on your knee,
Taking it all,
Paying a hidden fee,
To the engine.

Selling your soul,
Thinking you're not part of the sin,
And then wondering why does it smell so foul.

You're in it,
And so am I,
And so are the masses.
Programmed over the eras,
To chase the escape,
Forgetting that it's just vape.

Who are we kiddin?
We all can see,
Fom the seats we're sitting in,
Absorbing the malicious,
Expelling the benevolence,
and being blatantly shameless,
Forgetting that such an exsistence should be nameless.

But here we are,
Here we are,
Smitten by the evil kitten,
Claiming what can we do,
What can we do?

Who are you shittin?
Who are we shittin?
But ain't it fittin.

I guess we do belong,
We did reap what we sowed,
And we did it all together.


Here's a pill,
Forget that it'll make you ill,
But this is it.
There is no escape.
So why are we looking for salvation,
In the new phone,
In the company raise,
In the new hand bag.

Same fallacy,
Different phase,
Moving on.

The salvation you seek,
Is something that you'll find inside,
And even when you do,
She will never stick around.

So accept,
That every day won't be amazing,
And don't forget,
That everyday doesn't have to be bad,
And that's what this life is made of,
Till the day we all are just vape.
i was walking through the woods just the other day
then i heard a noise not so far away
so i took a look to see what it could be
it was coming fom a hole at the bottom of a tree
then i looked inside there i saw a frog
just inside the tree sat upon a log
the poor frog was crying with tears upon his face
he was very lost and lost his froggy place
then i picked him up and took him to his home
now the frog was happy and never again did roam.
Raj Arumugam Oct 2010
me no spit English, me no no Englis, OK?
me barbarrrian, why u one me speak Englis?
u teach me inglish then u want me slave, ya?
u teach me englis and mik mee go from nuture,
from da trees and de lakes and hum of me ancesdors, ya?
and you teach me englis
glive me your stinkin additudes
mik me pollute wold and **** wold like you, yes?
I del u, me spit no englis but sdill u offer skolarsips
and mik me shange name, and then tick on Englis name, ya?
then peeple call me englis name like tom, *****, hairy
or my wife become susan or margate
and me become kristian, yeah?
why I say no englis still u want to tich me englsi
and give me book and mi say, mi say,
luk at my nikid bady laik da die I was born
liiiv me one
don't tiich me englis
or wan day I will kurs and swera in inglis
like who, who, who, like that monster I hard play story
is he nime Caliban, yeah?
me barbarrbaian, dun't mike i civilized like u;
me no no inglis;
me happi with me lunguge and me hum
and my trees and likes and annncesdral places¦
I no wants to spit engilsi and khanges my name and culturte!
and un I no wan to go fom humen!
leave me lone wan, I say! me no spit englis!
or I put u in *** if you no go!
on haaw englsi changasz lifvez and woold
Dear Mr first name only somethings ya do dont really
make sense.
But even a drunk like me has to say it's enough.
Cause my drunk *** cant even stand let alone  strattle a fence.

Points was  the first straw  my invisable friend.
To make ten comments for a point.
Well i got far better things to do with my weekend.

And one night as from the bar i did crawl.
Thought i was just drunk off my ***.
But dam if ya didnt take down the wall.

But it's okay cause if ya wanna be on the list
you can always buy a place.
Ya know your dealing with poets right?
Hey some kid just took his parents credit card
and stole my place.

Mr Elliot  should i stay silent in fear.
It's hard to shut a good drunk up.
Was it you that put that horse head in my bed
and drank all my beer?

And while certin people gave us the name
they gave my foggy mind a idea to.
If ya keep us going at each other  then
that keeps us fom going after you.

Mr Elliot  please dont  read this and
make me dissapear.
For I'll take refuge  in my pub.
hide behind the women  and gaurd the rear.

Yes im the ressident ******* and clown.
The bartender to the masses.
Who preaches drink up and get down.

If it aint broke Mr Elliot lets **** with it till   it  is.
Let me hand ya a beer.
Shake it up good and watch it fizz.

Hello I hope this isnt goodbye.
Cause it just aint  much fun without Gonzo.
Im a drunk a *** a nut a pervert and a pretty nice guy.

Dear Mr Elliot sending me away wasnt  very nice.
When i think vacation  I think sun and sand.
Not the north pole  hey were the ***** santa?
Well  least for my drinks i got pleanty of ice.
Join the *******   if your not scared to have some fun
and if i dont dissapear after this
the heart it makes us live and makes the blood flow round
it controls our love as it begins to pound
gives us our emotions that we have inside
there inside the heart where emotion hides
it can tell your body when your love is true
there  with every heart beat deep inside of you
Iraira Cedillo Mar 2014
Just tell you that you are my bestest friend I had. When I started school from the beginning of the year you didn't let me down and you defend me from others and I defended you fom others you have friends I have friends your friends are my friends and my friends are your friends. I love you a lot you are like my cousin and sister (sis) love you a lot
By iraira cedillo
Michelle Long Feb 2012
Together we stand,
Making up the snow-white abyss.
Our souls, alike, become one.
Then I realize how only a memory is this.
And how the love I once felt is gone.

Alone now, only I stand,
The painful nothingness that surrounds.
My soul and body seem forever apart...
Consciousness returns-and so I remember...
What has brought me here from the start.

If only I could see you one las time...
In presence, apart fom only in mind.
With helpless hope I search again.
Though I know nothing is all I will find;
No life is left; my existance seems dead.

Maybe the memories of you that are in my heart
Are enough to keep me strong...
But when I realize, in the world around me, you're gone,
I break down...I just can't go along...
I suffer when I let myself know we're really apart.

Day apon night I continue to endure this...
Sometimes I wonder if you too can't bare,
Or if the white-abyss finds you as well.
Would you too have been there?
Is this pain something we share?

I force myself back to happiness;
Into the wonderful, safe abyss.
Yet this time when I begin to dream...
I see the truth I needn't to miss;
And I just can't make true this wish.
I wrote this years ago when I had no idea what love even was.
irinia Aug 2023
why
in the middle of seeing islands of fog
the roots disconnected fom the branches of thought
was it like this: you do not deserve to be
the vitality of forms, do not exist
we were told while breathing
do not exist in your bodies do not exist in your minds some dreams are just silly
dumb as that daylight
throats are full of words of unshed thinking
of noise so loud that the world might have imploded
dark circles of impossible pain contain our ribs
why are you here you were told, we don't want you
we  can not witness the joy of life with our teeth full of something we don't understand
our eyes are holding the light captive
like a knife full of strife
why are we here why
the fog obscures the echo
why are we here why
Mona May 2017
It's okay,
It's alright,
You have yourself,
Just like you do
every night.

You're at your worst?
Well so be it...
They didn't see
that your hearts unfit?
Then
so
be
it.

You hold that heart,
and you tuck yourself,
Command your breaths
To fall into context,
The world will be there tomorrow,
And the day will fall
fom your hardened grip,
The landslide will come to curve,
The drought will leave
no tears to shed.

Even if you have to be the ocean,
The sun, the moon and the land,
To walk yourself to the last shore,
You've got yourself to understand.

You can be that push of courage,
You can be the one to soothe,
Nothing in this world matters,
Not even this heavy weight of blues.
You wanna bet?

You're at your worst?
Then so be it..
Goodnight.
Himmatul Aliyah Dec 2013
A piece of the story flashed in the corner of the image wall....
Part of the past are back on stage and playing in memories....

Although the time has begun to obsolete but all will never be vanished....
Many cues that can not be conveyed yet....
Until the story didn't get to be continued....

In drizzle side that disturbing your figure fom this mind....
The rhythm of the wind conveying the sigh of longing....
Although the past isn't a lot tells about us....
If the time can be pulling back....
And hope all goes according to my wish....
Coloring sketch of the sky soul....
Carve many stories....
Share a story with you ..
Cheer spread  on your face....
Dismissed all the doubts that exist about you....
And together we're dyeing the dusk canvas with the wording....

In the flow of time we can only remember....
it's not possible to go back there....
Because this is only  "a piece of the story"
He was sitting alone by the window
In hopes that the phone would ring,
Just as he’d sat there every day
Since she’d disappeared last Spring,
But snow now lay in the gutter,
Was glistening up in the trees,
And his thoughts would stray fom the words he’d pray,
‘Won’t you please come home, Louise!’

The phone lay stubbornly silent,
The snow untouched in the street,
There wasn’t a cart or a tyremark,
Nor even a sign of feet.
The sky was louring grey outside
As it was, the day she went,
He wished he knew, but hadn’t a clue
There had been no argument.

He’d thought perhaps she’d been taken,
Had struggled, against her will,
But there’d been no sign of a ransom,
The phone had stayed silent still.
He’d asked her friends in the neighborhood
What she’d said, could they recall?
But all of them said Louise was good,
That nothing stood out at all.

Her clothes still hung in the wardrobe,
And gave off their faint perfume,
As days went by he would sit and cry
Could barely go in the room,
The Police were as good as useless,
Inferred she’d taken a walk,
‘She’s probably got a new boyfriend,
If only your walls could talk.’

The only clue that he’d ever found
Was a script in a bag she’d left,
He found the word unpronounceable
But strange that the script was kept,
She wasn’t a one for keeping things
She said there were bins for that,
She’d thrown out even a friendship ring
And an old and beaten hat.

One day there were footsteps through the snow
Wound up at his own front door,
He raced to open the doorway up
But the footsteps stopped at the floor,
There wasn’t a sign they’d gone away,
There wasn’t a sign of retreat,
Whoever had come to his front door
Was still out there in the street.

He went back into the study then
And gazed through the sudden rain,
He never knew when the phone rang through
It would cause him so much pain.
A voice intoned, ‘If you’re on your own,
Sit down, are you Brian Drew?’
And then went on with its dismal song
‘I’ve a message to pass to you.’

‘This is the Somerhill Hospice, with
A body, ready to claim,
It’s up to you, but it’s Louise Drew
She left a note with your name.
She finally died this morning from
That tumour, found on her lung,
We didn’t know she was married, though,
That note was under her tongue.’

‘She didn’t want you to suffer, it
Was better she went away,
She wrote she hadn’t told anyone
But came in as Louise Grey.’
Brian’s face became bloodless at
The wet footsteps in the hall,
Then took in the silent nothingness,
And threw the phone at the wall.

David Lewis Paget
Chris Grant Feb 2015
What shall we eat,
My tiny man,
With fingers white as bone.
The black bird nest
A badgers breast,
The story fom a stone.
Who will pluck my eyes from me,
The wriggling tongue that gibbers,
The earthen sod,
The Ravens nod
The moon out from the river.
Bat speak violin,
Toad speak drum,
Fly childer, raise skin
CreepWillows hum
Sk Abdul Aziz Jun 2015
I'm a dreamer......I dream the unreal
Reality for me is quite surreal
I am not pragmatic
Just at times a bit sarcastic
Hatred is annoying
Love is pacifying
Would be suffice.....
.....to say dat I value sacrifice
At times feel fed up of livin' in this domain of enchantment
Would like to run away and live in solitary confinement
At times am paranoid by hustle and bustle of the city
The condition of the village folks fills my heart with pity
The everyday routine of life is just so mundane
The 11 to 6 stuff feels kinda' insane......
Wanna escape from life just like an escapist
Fear is something we can't run from.....sooner or later we gotta face it
I ain't gonna appear in the books of history
Might as well vanish off the planet like a mystery
Have I lost my clarity of thoughts?
Life seems blank....can't seem to connect the dots
I'm not a bad guy.....just at times suffer fom frustration
Need a shoulder to rest my head....just need some motivation
I just wanna be heard.....don't need my name up in lights
Am a calm guy........never really get into fights
I feel as if i'm stuck in a tricky maze
Gotta clear my mind....seems to in a state of haze
At times i'm confused and dazed
The beauty of girls just leaves me amazed
I rap about love......rap about hate....
You can't manipulate me.....can't use me as a bait....
Superstition is nothin' more than a fallacy
Loyalty nowadays is quite a rarity
The path to glory is always filled with resistance
In the end it's the experience dat matters and not the journey's distance
I used to have an idea of where I stand
But now the idea's slipped right out of my hands
I don't who I am and where i'm going
The current of life is guiding my boat....i'm simply rowing
I'm done with bein' a ***** and sheddin' tears.....
It's time to be brave and conquer my fears
Gotta re-ignite my spirit....gotta keep the fire burnin'
No more lookin' back....no more turnin'
I need some time.....need some space......
Can't live no more within this crazy human race...
Wanna embark upon a path of rediscovery
Wanna improve my life and dispel off my misery
At times the thought of isolation scares me....
It strips me off my sense of morals and bares me
But when I give it a deep thought I realize...."Isolation's been my inspiration."
I gotta leave...gotta go....
There's nothin' here for me no more....
I gotta be free.......I gotta be...
.....Somewhere that I can just be me.
TERRY REEVES Feb 2016
THE CHINESE WERE RICH, ORDERED OYSTERS,
CLAMS AND YAMS, STEAK, BREAD AND BEER,
IT DIDN'T REALLY MATTER WHAT WAS DEAR,
OUT OF HOURS WAS A REFUGE FOM SHOWERS,
IT WAS NO PROBLEM WITH SPECIAL POWERS;
' WE' LL BUILD A HIGH - RISE LAH, SO FAR,
SO GOOD, A WINNER, IF ONLY WE COULD ......... ,'
'HAVE ANOTHER BEER, THEN WE'RE OUTA HERE,'
'DID YOU SEE THAT GUY ON THE COURSE?
HE MUST HAVE HAD FIFTY CLUBS IN THE BAG LAH,
YOU WOULDN'T THINK HE COULD PUSH THE TROLLEY THAT FAR,'
' HA, HA!  I'LL FIND YOU A NEW BAG FOR YOUR WOODS,
NO, NOT TIGER, FOOL, HE SHOULD STICK TO POOL,'
' YEAH, LIKE YOUR BEER - NO LONGER COOL LAH!'
CONVERSATION OVERHEARD IN A FOREIGN BAR.
NOTE: ' LAH ' = TERM OF ENDEARMENT.
David Nelson Jul 2013
Feeling Like a Man, Thinking like a Child

heart is searching for the answers
when it should be the brain doing the work
feelings of a grown wanting man
but a child's mind reaching thru the murk

rainbow's colors blinding the naked eye
living in a dreamscape of the future
throat goes desert dry as I begin to cry
in this grown up game of tug-of-war

like curious George wanting to know
swinging on this vine of aching love
questions should I stay should I go
looking up but nothing fom above

never wanting to cause a bit of pain
looking for a sunbeam through the rain
I must be crazy have I gone insane
rose sunglasses and a pearl white cane

this piece of work cannot explain
the consequences that come to mind
if I do this wrong can I do this right
feeling like a man thinking like a child    

Gomer LePoet...
Where, when
How.........
Do I regain
Consolation
Fom this
Hurting

The answers
Will not
Come
I know

And when
I am consoled
I will reread this
Poem
And remember
August 13th 2014
mike Oct 2015
i live in the plexiglass
separating the people
fom the snakes.
the elephants.
the people.
Crissel Famorcan Sep 2017
I
CITY OF WOE IS WHAT THEY CALLED THIS PLACE
CROWDED WITH DEPRAVED SOULS THAT WILL FOREVER RACE,
PURSUING A BANNER,THROUGH A BLACK HAZE
FOR THEIR LIVES CONCLUDED NEITHER BLAME NOR PRAISE

II
A SITE FULL OF PAINS AND LAMENTATION
NO WORD OF THEM SURVIVES THEIR LIVING SEASON
AND IN THEIR BLIND AND UNATTAINING STATE
THEY MUST ENVY EVERY OTHER FATE

III
GO!BEGONE FROM THIS PLACE FULL OF SORROW
TAKE CARE OF YOUR LIFE THAT YOU ONLY BORROW
AVOID WRONGDOINGS,KEEP ON DOING GOOD
SO BY ALMIGHTY GOD,YOU WONT BE SCOURGED

IV
BE GOOD ENOUGH TO FOLLOW GO'S COMMANDMENTS
LOVE YUR ENEMIES, AVOID CHASTISEMENTS
FOR GOD HATE THOSE PERSONS LIKE THAT
AND HE LET THEM SUFFER FOM HIS WRATH

V
DONT LIVE THIS LIFE JUST FOR YOUR OWN
TRY TO BE SELFLESS,BE  A MOTIVATION
SERVE AS SOMEONES INSPIRATON,
AND GLORIFY OUR FATHER,AS IS OWN NATION

VI
THESE ARE THE THINGS YOU NEED TO DO
FOR YOU TO AVOID BEING IN HELL TOO
LETS KEEP DOING GOOD TOGETHER
AND ALWAYS FOLLOW ALL OF GODS ORDER...
Michael John Mar 2018
in the spring
and agave falling
with rain coming in..

my heart a mad thing
light a caste stone
all blue and
emerald green!

i remember the springs
lord in crete
in crete..

ii

when i was young
and awed by nearly
everything
the blasted beat..
my brain a fried egg..

i looked in the mirror
and stared
who the **** was that there..

the blasted heat
the autumn sun
and wind
and i was a beach
***..

in my winter hut
the day a paper´s cut
away fom a soft
blinding night..

iii

when i was young..

iv

small bamboo constructions
right bang next to the surf..
with some red wine..

thus illiminating
the rent man..
stars and the moon..

and phospherous..
i had my guitar
and sang a song..

v

when i was young..

vi
in crete
in spring
is breath taken

from sweet gods
lip..
ambrosia broken..

a flailed heart trip
the blossems and a load
of pure beauty..

in crete
in spring
i found me..

i observed others
do like wise..
they shon and carried on..

in spring
when i was young
played backgammon

and drank cognac
no problem
no problem...






vi

to sail the clipper
the crow´s nest quiver
s in the grey brine

gulls dip their
soaring smiles
lost in mine..

love in horizons
lost in prayer
late too shiver

eyes of god in
bathes my soul
one great river..!

v
ne
She didn't like where she came fom
The smell of poverty, the curse of ignorance
Like a cloak draped round her every move
She stumbled and struggled.
But defience and armour were hers too.
From deep within there screamed a voice
These are not yours.
Take back your curses evil witch
You bore no good you stupid *****,
Take back your prattle, rattle
Now within your empty coffin.
For you are gone but I am free
Not tribe not blood not place not kin
Expose the soul that lies within.
everybody as a ghost it lives inside your the host
in your body it will dwell there inside your body shell
it is there until you die then fom your body it will fly

from your soul it will free from your body it will flee
searching for another shell where once again it can dwell
it will stay again once more.as it did the time before.
Jonas Jun 2023
Mom,
you taught me
taught me by example.

To be your honest and most authentic self.
Which made it hard for me to be myself.
I didn't know who I was anyway.
But now I see you are holding yourself back for me,
holding back the questions that must be killing you,
to ask,
"Are you okay, is my child happy?"
The fears of getting left (again), of being unworthy of love.
The fear you inherited, as did I.
Did you fail everyone?
Are you here with me listening, or is your head back in your mothers kitchen?
You have to fight for every word from me.

You taught me to hone my perception, to watch, to listen, to learn
To appreciate living life which always seemed the most beautiful to you,
no matter your circumstances.
You saw things in the sun, the flowers and the birds,
the way clouds shape forms and the wind dances in the trees.
Life was always worth living to you, without question.

So now I notice the tears in your eyes everytime we meet.
I notice how you dress up prettier than to any date you ever went to in the past, just for me.
That you wear the little black bracelet I gifted you to your birthday on a wimp, picked up fom a market stand, passing by ages ago.
It doesn't really go with much,

I notice that you have to swallow your pride and
practically beg for my time, a glipse of my life
chase me, drive me into a corner so I can't evade you
Just so I can keep mine.
It hurts me too to see.

I can't give you what you want,
You hurt me growing up, helped mess me up,
triyng to help
I've always been lonely, always alone, isolation became comfort.
I needed a mother. Someone to take care of me, guide me, force me.
Yes, fight me cause I was the enemey. And I was fierce.
But you couldn't. You were still looking for answers yourself.

I couldn't wait for you to finally find them.
I had to go on, go through without you, build my own stability.
So I build many walls brick on brick, and I stacked high.
Even more between us, thicker than blood.
Because a mothers word is like a sledge hammer.
It breaks through wether you like it or not.
Always hits home, my neglected, angry, lost, little heart.
The world always seemed to much for me.

Yesterday a friend held me and didn't let go, let me escape,
Another let me rest in her lap and went through my hair.
The last time I had that and accepted it...
I can't remember
It's already hard to allow myself peace, worse even love,
but almost impossible to ask for it.

I'm slowly healing now, dancing through streets,
singing along to music so the neighbours can hear
Being my most authentic self without any forcing or faking.
Bringing out my innocent, cheeky childlike side to the light.
A honest smile without hiding the sadness in my eyes.
Trying to be brave to try and evantually fail again.
To walk the world and not look down, nor avert my gaze,
run and hide away.

I'm meeting people who support me, encourage me, push me.
Ther are so few of them, who care.
Maybe to few.
I'm still not very good at it. But it's getting better.

Opening up would still mean breaking my heart and yours too
it would mean hurting you, bringing you to tears again.
I don't want that.
You've been hurt enough, I've hurt you enough.

I can't take care of you. I can hardly do so for myself.
I'm still unable to cry for myself. Even when I try to push it.
I don't think things will ever be okay. I don't think we will ever have a family. That's not brokem.
But that's okay.

Honestly I don't think I really want to be fine.
I don't want to be fixed.
It's a part of me. This is me.
It has been for such a long time, I wouldn't know what to do without it.
It is my strenght and my weakness, my anchor and the strom.
My cage that I'm trapped in. Locked from the inside.
It feels safer here. I get to be in control for the most part.

I'm sorry mom,
I'm trying.
But some things can't be undone. Some things stay broken.
It's in the cracks where I  can find the most beauty in life.
Max Hale Aug 2023
People can let you know
The moment they feel unwell or sick
The main event is sat before table
never always as clear with those that cannot speak to us to ask for help.
The event may be passed over like a paper towel
The upright life has another facet, gesture and whisper, but not recognised at once
The care of our beloved pets exceeds logic but revolves around the silence, How can we know when its time, time to react to our thoughts and make action
If only we might communicate, through precious literature, knowledge or hunch. Our pets serve us with their love, without demand. At no time are they lookinģ for us to suit their lives, yet we do it anyway. We know, or believe we know their inner- most desires.
The sad events of any loving entity make leaving the earth a soulful, heart-breaking time.
Our love reciprocal gives us a reason to worry beyond reason almost before a predicted outcome
Then closing their eyes for the last time need not be as sad but merely a transition or gateway to the Summerlands. Loving us as they do it is never final, but significant only in a physical state
Their love and spirit for us lives forever. Returning to the stars in the sky, Lily shines on her way to eternity knowing her life was precious and fulfilling in leaving pawprints in our hearts and to stardust fom whence she came.
For dear Lily, a beautiful loving cat who filled the world with wonder and love ***
Ryan O'Leary Apr 2019
Corect me if I'm wong
because I am fom China
leaning English in County
**** Republic of Ieland
Gr8Ryzyngz Jun 2019
I gotta stay out my feelings
Red whines and hazy ceilings
Sipping that drip fom your lipz
My my my my my my my body
Been yearning for your shine
To brighten the darkest of knightz
Trying so hard to save them very
Same hoes, again captain
Save that ***** who never
Asked for your kind of savings...
Epic Poetical Sep 2024
I.
On that divine-like hands and laps of thine, my grandmother, each moment I embraced the new learnings.

Well, in that tranquil Spring night when the wave of stars washed away my eyes, I cried for them to have in the small hands of mine. Since then, I learnt to cry.

In order to soothe my longing cry, thou hast sung me the rhyming lullaby that spreaded the formless form of smile on my face. Since then, I learnt to smile.

At that cooing rhythm of thy song; thou hast energetically swung me high and low in the air, whilst my body seems to have lost its weight so light. Since then, I learnt to get thrilled by the melody of song.

A feeling of overflowing on an edge of the wind has brought the word of excitement to my unawake mouth, ehh.. since then, I learnt to speak a word.

That morning, Aye, drunk by the golden dawn, the wave of my eyes reached to the falling leave at the distant height. The very curiosity to catch hold of it has burnt my little heart. Since then, I learnt to curious about the things.

Slipping away from thy hand, I ran to catch the falling leave. But O fie, I couldnst catch it! I followed its flight —but the wind took it farther away. My eyes couldnst reach to it anymore, as it gradually disappeared at invisible sight. Since then, I learnt to walk.

Thou art my model, my grandmother! These all childly learnings alighted from that holy-like hands and laps of thine. I regard thee.

II.
I extend the words from that little heart of mine— and that's my deepest Adulation to thee, my beloved parents!

I know not how I've wandered upon the Mesh of age to reach this mile of oldness— nor dost I know how I've rushed on over the trouble obstacles I encountered each age.

Such little strange tale of mine evolved from thy ***** hands, my beloved parents!

In the kingly and queenly world of thine, I expanded on the rhythm of an ineffable joyance. I know not the bound— but surely I cherished the flower and its hidden honey thou hast bestowed upon me, from that holy adornment of thy hearts.

Thou hast attained all my childly cravings and worn a garland of smile to this sullen face of mine.

Thou hast taken care of me from all sorts of ailings. Thou hast given me the warm garments and never let my body ailed by the cold breeze in Winter and tanned by the barnstorming heat in Summer.

Mother, when the hunger ailed my stomach, I spelt out thy name and cried
In dissonant pitch.Thou hast given me a plate of rice. In the amidst of night when the silence has spreaded its wings, the unrestrained thirst parched up my throat. I awoke thee— so thou hast given me a cup of water to quench my thirst.

Father, the most I must not forget about thee is thou hast shaded the blood and dropped down the endless sweat onto the earthly mud to give me this excess of life.

I'm grateful to both of thee, my beloved parents! Without both of thy presence,
I would not have made my life so far and so long. I regard thee.    

III.
Mother, I've cried out the mighty tears
For one thing— and that's the signet ring.

I cried all day and all night for that. I
Even refused to take the meals thou

Hast given to me from thy queenly hand.
Thou hast bought me the little play toy—

But fie, couldn't bring the harmony to these dissonant eyes of mine! The tears

Unseemly overflowed on its expanding Despair. I was a small and innocent kid,

My mother, as I saw that signet ring Glitter bright on the man's finger, it took

My eyes' captive  away and made me
Oozed upon the brooks of longingness.

By then, I witnessed the tears in my eyes.
I knew not how to extinguish this burning

Agony of my heart— it seemed more Intense as the days passed. All of my

Energies lost to pale weakness. I seem To have had sleepless nights; tossing

And turning on the bed, overshadowed
By the ailing insomnia. I only wished to

Have it on one of my fingers, bright and Illuminating grace like a blue diamond.

It was thy love, at last, thou Hast given it to me on the final day

And cured the very tears of craving. I Heaved a sigh of relief since then.

IV.
Such a blesseth land, have I ever taken my refuge!
Such a blesseth land, is only my century-long home!

Thou art my home for the generation long, my beloved Motherland, how lovely thou art! Thou hast given me a fine place here to take a long and joyant abide.

I took the deepest privilege to spend my life here, embracing the endless blessings of no bound thou hast bestowed upon me. The joy of course, I have cherished a fragrance of this very land, in an ineffable bound of pride.

All that hush and composed mountains that weave the picturesque sight; all that rich and benevolent water that evokes the sweet taste like that of honey; and all that earthly and never-fading mud that upholdest the living beings. O, I never knew I was used to them! Such is my luck!

My life flowers bright here upon thy heavenly garden; and now I'm able to create the beauty of my own within and out like Camellia. I wish my life had no bound and all my body and limbs were immortal, I would heave infinite steps of age, century after century, turning olds into new...

All that thou hast dispensed me doth not belong to me, but I taketh it as holy blessing. Thou hast given me all thy shelters and stood before me shameless and bare. In fact, thou hast protected me from all trouble obstacles of sorts, such is thy holy grace, My beloved motherland!


Such a blesseth land, have I ever taken my refuge!
Such a blesseth land, is only my century-long home!

I am deepened down into the bottomless pride, for I am born to this land of kingly harmony. It's thy pleasure that indeed, I should be grateful to thee, for thou hast  taken care of me till this age far. Such is my fortune!

What knowest others of thee? What knowest others the taste of that golden honey, so-thickly ebbs out of thy ***** heart that seems ineffable.

For me, thou art all that higher than the universe; and there's no above thee, such is thy strength! Thy love is an unattainable worth. I canst return thy love even though my life extend a hundred decades long.

It's indeed the sin to step upon the holy-like body of thine; but thou art receptive by nature, and such is thy holy grace; my beloved motherland, thou hast carried me these long years bearing all sorts of weariness.

Such a blesseth land, have I ever taken my refuge!
Such a blesseth land, is only my century-long home!

V.
Mother, the Emblem of love
A residence of the eternal glory
A supreme fragrance, and the Utopian idealist
Gifted one
Strong existentialist
beneath the
cosmology

O, the incumbent mother!
Thou art an antidote to our
daily miseries—
and a song to our
timeless euphoria
We art blessed
under thy cosmic arms

It is said that thou
hast attained
a realm of love— the unattainable pinnacle
Where we imbibe
the nectar of happiness
Thou art
the ethereal guardian,
A mirror-image to celestial soul
Where we art thy shadows,
The shadows thou uphold'st

Hiding tears behind
The eyelashes,
Putting a facade of smile,
Thou equipped
Us with love and care
Like the sun nourishing sunflower

O, the selfless existence!
A remnant of the pre-existed mother-
The ''Goddess Devi''
We art grateful to thee,
For always taking care of us
Without thou, there is no concept of Existence
(Everything is meaningless)
              
VI.
In this very fragrant and heavenly garden of thine, my noble king, I am one of the blooming flowers.
                      
Indeed, I had luck to be grown upon thy garden; and I never knew I would grow rich in fragrance, it's only the blessing thou hast bestowed upon me as a century-long gift.
                      
All that I am embracing is none other than the grace of light that showers richly from thy own kingly heart, and it knows no bounds.
                      
This small garden of thine, for which thou hast immense love, lies at one periphery of thy heart.
                        
Thou hast carried it against all the trouble storms and protected these long years. Each day, thou hast tirelessly worked to give the very harmony to this garden of thine.

That's how all the flowers have come to bloom of their own each, so bright and aromatic.

As the very petals of mine have touched
Thy majestic hands, it giveth the endless birth of pride to my heart.

How fortunate am I to be grown
Upon this garden of thine!

Each morning, I awaken not just to bloom  but to offer thee my fragrance in humble devotion, for thy timeless love and care.

VII.
At this age of thy oldness, my grandfather, as I touch thy supreme hands, these very intengible eyes of my heart break down in tears of adoration.

It's because of thy grandfatherly love and contributions I am offering the words to thee. Those words are of my heart and have been hidden and unslipped out at the edge of my lips to this very day.

Knowest thou the time before the break of vergin dawn....

Getting up early as 4 in the morning, walking upon the harsh meadow enshrouded by the thick dew, and getting the water from the distant away, bearing the cold touch of winter breeze.
Two jerkins full of water weighing thy hands heavy, no torch but walking under the grace of rich moonlight.

Ah, had it been today, I would've at least
helped thee carry one.

Boiling the water warm for our washing,
Cooking the rather-delicious breakfast for us, helping us wear the gho neat and clean, and reaching us all the way to the school on foot.

Ah, had it been today, I would've at least walked the school by myself.

Celebrating the pain of love within like a man of supremety, all the days tirelessly sweating and soaking in other's field, and earning the petty amount of ransom for our timely welfare and school stationaries.

Ah, had it been today, I would've at least worked by myself and taken care of my school needs.

Bearing the body heavy with tiredness, yet coming till the school entrance to get us. Wearing the torn jacket, folding the wounded arms tight, and waiting all alone at the gate thro' the passage of time, till the school hour over.

Ah, had it been today, I would've at least returned home by myself.

I wonder how thou hast passed half of thy life with us, my grandfather! Taking care of us all day and all night
living in the small and ill- thatched camp wast challenging for thee.

It's by virtue of thy all-day and all-night presence, we've grown healthy and untroubled to this day.

 VIII.
In this fragile land abidest thy coy footprints unwithered; and it seems that the sweat thou hast droppeth down, I would still find there. I could recall thy wounded hands healed by the painful blisters.
Each day toiling in the field; ploughing beneath the scorching sun, cutting down the grass and feeding the herd of cattle, and walking towards the moorish hill in search of the firewood. Alas!  No slippers on feet yet enduring the harsh sting of nettle. Indeed, thou hast never failed carrying out thy duties. Thou hast turneth up each moment wast special for thee.
In thine eyes I've grown this age. I shared my love and joy with thee and simultaneously, I learnt to carry out all the external work and withstand the pain. Although I've come across the endurance, thy continues guidance hast shaped my each learning.
Thou hast made me a master at rather young age. I would regard thy fatherly companionship and mastership. Today, I could see change in thee. The weight of years hast overshadowed thy wandering age but the fire within, thou keepest bright and unfade in thy heart.
That's why I still see thee labouring at this age— despite thy oldness. All that I'm living today is because of thy endless hardwork and tenacity.

 IX.
The only glory heaven that has ever revealed to my eyes is thee, my dear patria! How could I forget thee in the passage of time!

Thou art mine friendly companion and all that infinite memories, I have in one store of my heart today, have bent forth since my childhood alongsides thy endless play, my dear patria! How could I forget thee in the passage of time!

I know, when the time has held my feet, I left thee in speechless grief for the months long. But surely I mourned for that, as it was my folly, my dear patria! How could I forget thee in the passage of time!

Over the steady heave of months, the
uneasy flake enshrouded the terrains of mine heart, often troubling me to weave upon the mesh of time. Thy mystic love now and then ebbed my being in silent utterance.

All that pictures gleamed before my eyes were of the fragile land where I reside, the graceful mountains and gorges that often caught my gaze, and the buoyant dwellers. Not only that, the tastes of those fruits and the clean water have haunted my taste bud.

And now all of my agonies have settled calm, for I'm back and shalt lose myself in thy majesty, my dear patria! How could I forget thee in the passage of time!

 X.
In thine sweet farewell, my beloved teachers, my eyes burst out the tears in silent grief— for our years of flowery union in the school have faded with the passage of time.

                          
Our teacher-student love was deeply and utterly rooted under the substratum of hearts. Unseen yet surely a felt relish. We enjoyed the days through learnings and experiences. Together, we rushed against the stony obstacles and vicissitudes of life and thrived under the gracious illumination of education.
                            
Not only that, in our unlawful conducts were thee the masters behind to uphold our immorality and make us grow with rich ornaments of discipline. Thou hast well treated us— indeed good and humane as though we wert thine own sons and daughters.

                              
Thou hast scolded to us at our undone homeworks was varily right on our part, I claim that for otherwise we wouldst not have grown and reaped the sweet fruit of an accademy.

                              
Thus, we shalt regard thy unwavering care and mentorship done to us in all our stay in the school. The unrevealed light of knowledge thou hast revealed in our sky shalt guide us through the passage of our lives. More importantly, the sweet fragrance of love that ever sweetened our lives came fom the garden of thine own hearts, and 'tis going to haunt us here on. I claim that.
        
                                  
With this, I pen off and I wish my verses would reach to thee someday. Fare thee well to all my kingly and queenly teachers and it's uneasy at my heart to          
leave thy kingdom on its lonesome.

 XI.
O monk, the worthiness
of this long-sleeved, wide and dark, saffroned robe. I, the byfarer, ever walk to thy lonely temple to seek blessings from thee. Wouldst thou lead me in? For I've no sins nor scorns in my heart. I've withered the dark hues of sins and scorns to the glanceless colour.
O monk, before thou
leadest me in, let me not forget to bow down my whole body onto thy barefeet. Thou on the edge corner of thine alter hall givest me the warm floor to rest my body. Thou takest out the beads. Ready for chanting prayers and
songs. O monk, shall
I join thee or keep my mouth all shut and tight in silent listening. Ah such is thee and thy costless bliss, love, and nobility are divine attributes that I ever aspire to reach. Thou offerest the millions of butter lamps for me and for all kin beings around and across this din world. Ah when I leave from here, let me not forget to extend my deepest
gratitude alongsides holy
    reverence.
Oh the very heart of me is breaking
this disaster was mine to be responsible for making
Most people don't notice that I am shaking
due to all the drugs I am currently taking.
I can't help it, I self medicate
wishing I could almost put myself straight on sedate.
I end up inebriated
trying to get my *** faded
I am half way intoxicated.
Seeing through eyes that are jaded.
There are few in whom I would care to confide my thoughts about premeditated homicide.
I carry myself with all the pride
I carry all this pain deep inside
I am someone's die or ride.
I failed but I really tried.
Wiping at the tears I have cried.
Part of me has died
that part is never coming back
the shadows just as still as they are black.
I've got sunshine in a sack
no I am not talking about crack.
I didn't think that I had to still live like that
Falling a full blown panic attack
Chaos and calamity I can't help but attract
A soul can not run on a backwards track
Clickety ******* clack clackety ******* click
No one understands just what really makes me tick.
In my head my thoughts are sick.
Someone help me please help me quick.
I will burn your house down with a candle stick so you won't hear my lighter click.
Now something wicked this way is about to come
I urge the demons to get them some.
Fee fie foe fom
go to fom foe fie fee
Hoping the giant of this beanstalk don't see me.
The pain has left  me feeling completely numb
I try hard to push my way passed it all, my only rule of thumb,
The bigger they are the harder they fall
crimson Stains on the tile floor of a bathroom stall
some forgotten and ungodly hall.
I started this little trip with a eight ball
I hate all this ******* lies and all
I may look as if I am standing tall
back flat up against the wall
I don't know who the hell I could even call.
No one will catch me if I fall
I know that for certain
As my fat *** sits here hurting
close the blinds and those curtains
so no one outside can see into my room
that is filled with so much gloom.
It's starting to feel like it is my tomb
the feeling of doom
***** the air right out of the room.
I think I am starting to suffocate
I can't be lead to believe that is my fate.
I will never get this **** straight
It isn't feeling so ****** great.
Wonder if anyone else out there can even kind of relate.
We all seem to be filled with hate for each other instead maybe we should love one another.
For in God's eyes everyone is my sister or my brother.
Ease up some you are almost beginning to end up letting me start to feel like I m going to smother.
I sometimes don't have faith that from this tragedy I'll someday recover.
I really stopped being a fighter I am more of a lover
underneath the sheets I am covered.
In the sky if I could I would probably just hover. Watching everyone and everything in my sight
I am so far left they call me can't get right.
**** seizing the day I would rather rule the night my flames, in my hell's burning bright.
I think I lost my will to even fight.
I can't help wondering if I will really be alright
or if I will waste away waiting for the  arrival of my white knight

Left in my very wake
My soul you simply cannot take
I left everything on complete devastate
It's up to me to get the story out there So I create
a conversation that sparks a huge debate
Everything I touch I complicate.

As for me and these **** demons I usually tend,
I now must simply contend
Thirsting the nefarious ones of my misfortune they drink
Paired with the unpredictable demons I wait to go extinct
Teetering on a psychotic episode I Totter on the very brink
I know that everything could very well go up in a puff of smoke, in just a blink.
I can't concentrate. I don't even know what to think.

No one would have ever believed
Just how much peace into the atmosphere had  been breathed
Some of this stress has automatically been released
Hanging above me and my demons now unleashed
Are tragic skies that have been Disastrouslun streaked
My vicious inner beast
is so disembodied now its in a deep sleep
Just Like me the monsters I conjure are quite unique
Coughing choking I sound like I am dying but I am enjoying the relief
Please pass that sweet leaf

From these moments and memories that at best
bittersweet
i find myself just running away atte to retreat
I don't know what it really is that I actively seek
My very intentions are just now starting to reek
I open my mouth and accidently double speak
I cannot help the fact that I feel so incomplete
I refuse to accept defeat
Now I lay me down to do anything but sleep
I think in my addiction I am in way to deep\
Now all I can think to do is to render myself obsolete
I stand here just kind of chilling in disbelief
overcome I am with all this **** grief
That I am in fact a sick sad mess underneath
I sure could use just a. Little more of that sweet leaf if you have any to spare
So ****** up not looking at anything but seemingly I stare
My emotions are just as raw as they are bare
Is anyone that's here right now even really even there.
Don't tell me it really doesn't matter because I don't care.
I do just whatever I dare
For something to go as I had planned is very rare
For what's coming next how could I ever prepare.
Father I've come to you in prayer
Please won't you confirm that you up there.
Explicit
there is lots of beauty when springtime comes around
daffodils and tulips popping from the ground
showing of there colors for there flower show
warms your soul inside gives your heart a glow.

sun begins to shine birds begin to sing
happy as can be bringing in the  spring
the cockerel on the fence bringing in the dawn
welcoming the world to a springtime morn

creatures they come out from there winter bed
fom there hibernation for the spring ahead
the beauty that is nature growing wild and free
there in all its glory there for us to see

— The End —