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Kathy Z Jun 2013
Perfection,
is an illusion, created by the mocking
sanity of the people
in this newspaper world.

Fairytales were something made up as well-
for the entertainment of children,
to enjoy their life,
their innocence
before reality took it all away from them.

No matter how far I chased the rabbit,
I was not Alice in Wonderland.
And even though the glass slipper fit,
I was not Cinderella.

My Hogwarts letter didn't arrive either;
when I was eleven.

And foolishly, at that time,
I cried.
I cried because my dreams were not real,
and that something this good could not exist in this world.

But-
I do not regret crying.
I cried for everything little in the world-
For my broken pipe that would never shoot water out in a straight line-
For my microwave that would always keep the food cold,
and the refrigerator that would always keep the food warm,
and for the 'tap tap' of the lady's heels
from the apartment above mine.

People say that heaven is a beautiful place
full of anything you could ever imagine.
Would it have all my dreams there, then?
In a plastic goody-bag, prehaps.
A certain one dished out to every person-
Angels looking left and right without a care for identity.

I hate it when my phone gets too warm.
I hate it when my favorite books get wrinkled.
I hate it when I lose my wireless mouse.
I hate it when the internet takes too long to load.
I hate it when the tempature of the room is either too cold, or too hot for my liking.
But I love all those hatreds.
I love how my phone gets too warm, warming my hands up in winter.
I love how my favorite books get wrinkled, so I can lovingly patch them up again.
I love how my wireless mouse always gets lost, because then I have an exuse to buy a corded one.
I love how the internet takes too long to load, because then I can go eat while I'm waiting.
I love how the tempature gets too cold or too hot, because then I can stick an ice cube on my forehead, or bundle up with my favorite scarf in winter.

My mother always told me to be mysef, that I was perfect just the way I was-
I tried,
but all my sentences from that point on would come with a stutter.
"D-Did you hear?"

The voice of the piano that strums so gently beneath my fingers,
I love that sound.  
It was the first time I could be sure-
if music had a face
it would smile,
teasingly,
desparingly,
at me.

And now I'm listening to "Light up the Sky" by YellowCard,
lying on my bed and thinking how much the lead singer
looks like Draco Malfoy.

I love the way poetry sometimes has a shape,
either a diamond,
or a heart.
And I am stunned, when I see those-
In fact, I saw one yesterday,
it was a tiger,
coliling around spairled trendles of
black and white
words.

I wonder how words move people to tears.
they're just words, anyway.
Nothing that would exist if humans weren't here.
but I love the way that I can actually cry
when I hear a beautiful piece of poetry.
I would say 'thank you thank you'
over and over again,
but I couldn't speak for the sound in my head.

And the stereotypical, rentless movies,
on sale-
half price!
at BlockBuster,
I bought them all,
just for the sake of spending some money,
I think.

And I watched them all, alone in the night with nothing but a bowl of popcorn by my side.
They were colorful, crazy, wild
And I drank in that feeling, throwing up my arms
with a freedom that I have never felt before.

I love writing poetry,
because words are truly beautiful.
And I love reading over my old poems, and scoffing at what I thought was eloquent before.
Because that means,
I have grown.
Something Infallible, Like Eternity,
That's a good title.
I love the clicking of keyboard keys, feeling the notch of F and J under my fingers.

And I love this world,
for all its imperfections and mistakes,
becuase then there can always be something better after it.
After all, if you're at the top, all you can do is fall.
robin Jul 2013
there is no such thing as an antihero,
only a villain
who has found an exuse,
an antagonist who can speak more prettily than
all the others
who can lie holes straight through
the hero's
heart,
find their place in the universe
and blot it out on the map because
the universe
does not tend towards anything
but solitude.

you will find yourself all alone.

you will find yourself all
alone
and you can snap the neck of every doll you own but
despair will never be anything more than
an unrequited love, an
attachment that you never grew out of, a
high school crush that you stapled to your heart so as you grew it was like
a gastric bypass
you cannot hold as much love in your heart
as your mother
said you could
but you can kiss and sigh and with every moue you'll wonder just
why
your chest feels fit to burst when you get any deeper than
touch
heart fit to rupture you are the main villain
of every book
i've read
the antagonist in every story you are
the angry girl whose doll parts
lay in pieces
at her feet
whose bomb will detonate if you get too close
{the character i could relate to the most the character i hated the most the character
i talked to whenever i could and
memorized every line to replay, god
i hate
the way you speak
and i want
to hear
it more}
i ripped out your staples and added my own.
{despair will never reciprocate but
i understand you i
do
because we are the same and i hate you because
you hate yourself
and i could give you nightmares every night and
listen to your motives
every
morning
'people are disgusting'
you said
as if it was
a revelation}
you're not ****** up, just out of luck
because four-leaf clovers can't survive droughts.
you are seventyeight percent water
and every drop you spent on
drowning
the background characters
and every doll on your bedroom floor
{i love the way you cry when you laugh because every time
i hope
that one, that one tear
is the final drop wrung from the shroud
of a sailor a burial at sea
and you will crumble
into
dust}
you angry girl your eyes
are a yellowing bruise on the storyline
your backstory is a rash
on the protagonist's hands
and all your inner demons told you you were not alone but
you explained them away and
appeals to pity left you empty.
i will rip out all your staples i
will make you
seventyeight percent
saltwater
my heart is a mirror you can find yourself there and
reassemble yourself
from all your broken parts
i will be the blueprint from which
you rebuild
yourself

{a story is nothing
without
a villain}
Stephanie Jan 2019
Can I take a day?
I just can't do it, is that enough of an exuse?
I couldn't get up this morning because I felt like vomiting from the simple thought of interacting with others, is that even an exuse?
Is it ridiculous that I cried myself to sleep last night and couldn't get any sleep because of memories and moments that have been long gone for years?
I don't even know how I remembered those certain moments because I'm pretty sure everyone else forgot about that little insignificant slip up I am too cowardly to let go.
If my fingers shake from picking up the phone in order to make a phone call to call out, am I making a big deal out of what other people do so easily?
Is it odd the way I bite my nails in fear of social interactions or upcoming deadlines?
I wouldn't have to fear that deadline if I had just done my work on time but I'm left with extra mounds of work to finish because I got distracted and disheartened from finishing something so easy.
Did you know I lie awake looking at my wrists and wondering what it would be like to cut just one little line?
I swear it will be just one time I wouldn't want everyone to know I actually meant those suicidal jokes, that would just ruin the punchline don't you think?
Even if I feel not up to doing anything, does it matter?
Excuse me for being sensitive.
I apologize for not being like everyone else who has their life together.
I apologize for being such a disappointment to my family.
From the way I burned through books I bet they thought I was going somewhere, preferably harvard of course.
It didn't matter how lonely I was, the lack of friends meant that I wasn't out doing meaningless stuff like forming a connection with other people.
Oh dear me, I was the teachers pet in middle school every adult loved me.
They had high expectations for me.
It didn't matter that I was isolated and considered the oddball.
They thought I was a genius.
Their approval was the only thing that was relevant about me.
Imagine the surprise it was that I didn't get straight A's.
Harvard never sent me an email of acceptance.
I was simply anxiety ridden me.
What a disappointment, they expected me to go to some prestigious university and discover the cure to some fatal illness.
I was supposed to go places.
I am deeply sorry, if I cry could I be excused?
So considering all of that and so much more, can I take a day?
You left me! you left us!
A broken family
A broken home!

You walked out on your children
The people you was meant to "love"
But you didn't

GO **** YOUR SELF!
YOU'RE NOT DAD OF MINE
YOU A PATHETIC EXUSE OF A DAD
ClawedBeauty101 Apr 2018
"Who would?..."

I turned towards them in question, misunderstood

"Exuse me?" Who would what?"

It was Easter Sunday, the beginning of a cut

"Who would ever love you?"

"Who would want you? Very few"

I wanted to fight back, but my request was ignored

"Honestly, to think someone would fight for you without a reward?"

"Who would give up their time to face your burdens?"

They're mission to destroy was more then certain

"Who would seriously sacrifice themselves for a shadow?"

"Who would burn up their own lives to save you from Hells flaring meadows?"

"Answer me!!! And look at you!!!"

"Look at your disturbing sins and wretched words! You know it's true!"

"Are you mute?! Have nothing to say??"

"Come on answer!!! You black cat, who hides in the brightness of day!!!"

"Who could... Who would... even dare to lend a hand?"

"And give the price of their own body and blood?... No man.."

I starred, anger under my breath, my vision becoming watery and unclear

What was my response? You really want to know?... Then wait then til tomorrow, a new poem will be here
Feel free to write a response about what you'd say or think or whatever

Cat Lynn ///
4/1/18
thyreez-thy Dec 2020
High school, 5 years
Your "best years" your best tears
Find out all your quirks and traits
Become the things you solemny hate


Start horrible habits, join a club
Your mother isn't proud, niether is the man above
Be classed to a certain group
Learn things like English and angles acute

Meet people you'll love, that eventually leave
Your first(or one of many) love that starts to deceive
Use studies as an exuse to enjoy solitude
Make your bad days an excuse to have a terrible attitude

The last days Will come, surprisingly missed
Even some of the jerks, how you always got ******
A Reunion to see your "best" ex-friends
As fast as it began, it takes longer to end
High school days
PEARL SMOKE May 2018
Open your Wings
Stretch them wide
You ready ? Prepare to fly.
Your Free butterfly.

No more Living Unhappy.
You felt You Were trapped with me
You couldn’t Move Comfortably
You felt watching your steps was a reason to always be upset.
You felt Boundries were a punishment & i got upset over any little thing.
You wanted everything to go only your way.
Your views and Your Interests were Forced on me.
I had to do it all Or Els the king would Take it offensively.

You set rules I mandatory had to follow with out questioning .

I set rules. you complained & Still Broke each one of them .

Your feelings Had to be cared for.
My feelings always injured and ignored.

In your eyes I was Always incorrect.
My actions somehow manipulated You to feel furious & upset .

I Could never express my pain
You throw a fit saying “here we go again you always want to argue and talk ****”


You felt trapped
You wanted to be loved
In a way where you do what you want and the other obeys controlled to act your preferrable way.
You placed  restrictions
though it could never apply to you
Somehow you always had an exuse .
Mateuš Conrad Mar 2018
/don't exuse yourself feeding me soya, when you could have had me playing with Harambe! as i played with the baby bear in a Danzig zoo!

the birth, and the life,
the womb,
   for 9 months
that became 90 years...
culminating,
   in a gravel tomb.

        O... mother...
woman...
          but one,
                 sacrifice.

take your parasite labour,
and ingest
a truer form...
      to compare...
  motherthood, a job...
why,
would any, man,
wish to bother with
this trajectory,
subsequently?

                   leave the copper skins
in the prophesy of queen Sheba...
bow...
          out...
                 leave them to it...
next to the golgotha pyramid
                       of Bagdad;

i heave not heart to feel,
the heave the utter lack
of testicles for a translation for man's eyes
to see.

— The End —