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Tobi Jul 4
I told myself
I'll change for you
No more smoke,
No more honey

But I ask if you
In my folly
A Christ girl like you
Make me jolly

Come on baby,
Just one night
All I ask
Is that you lay on me

But I know that's foolish
You're too good for me
So I beg, beg I do
That you do this:

One finger on me
And you'll set me free
It'll be a new kind of high
Set my world on fire

I'll stop, I promise
I'll stop, I swear
That today
I'll stop

No more drinks
No more smoke
Is what you ask
That's not hard

Because it's you
Yes you, I'll hold on
And yeah, I did use yesterday
But it starts now

Because I'm trying,
I'm really trying
To change my ways
And set myself for you bae

Ok...maybe just one more
Please, baby let me have one more
All I ask is that I get
Is one more high

Besides, I pleaded
That you touch me
But no, you just want me
To have misery

So please, yes please
Let me set free
Because only my devices
Give me life

I said you're my wife
But you ran away
What a spite
You said, and I recall clearly

"Change your ways
Put it down
Stop punishing me
For your sins.

Because I grieve,
I grieve that you'll be him
The man God promised me
Because I don't recognize you."

Come on baby,
Just one finger
Is all I need
To be set free

Just give me, yes give me
What I need, because
I need you, and you only
To give me wings
Tobi Jul 4
I almost told a girl
"I think you're pretty."
But then I burnt my tongue
Since when did I cower
Oh pity!

Yes, I said it
Well didn't say it
But she's got
A radiant smile
And eyes that glow

I can't tire from her laugh
It gives me strength
I'm entangled in a thousand
No a million thoughts
When I see her

But my friend is closer
Too close I say
She might be taken
I thought, I swore out loud
I never stood a chance

But it's kinda dumb
She's still my friend
We love each other
But I still dream
That she becomes my lover

Oh Misery!
Have pity!
Why can't someone like her
Kiss me on the lips and say
"You're mine."?
Tobi Jul 4
I look at you
And say,
"Not anymore"
**** it!

You lied and stole
My kindness
And whatever
We were

I'm tired of you
You bring me misery
Besides, you need
Not my pity

Besides, if I left you
You wouldn't bat an eye
Because others
Love you too

So why care anymore?
You'll go off to your tower
And shower your love
To all that care

But me, me!
I wouldn't care
Your love to me
Died yesterday

There was once a time
I thought we only part
When the bomb dropped
And the world caved in

But now! Now!
I don't even hate
I just dislike you
****! I only liked you

Anyways, my misery
I'll try to show pity
But don't expect
Love from me

Why care anyway?
You'll go off to your glass castle
And shower your grace
To all that love you

But me, me!
I wouldn't care
Your love to me
Died yesterday

You have friends,
You have love,
So you definitely
Don't need me anyways

So you
My misery
My misery
Let me breath

****! Why care?!
Why care anyway?
Don't you
See that you hurt me

You'll go off to your capital
Of your golden empire
Shower your love
To all that adore you

But me, me!
I wouldn't care
Your love for me
Died yesterday

And I know,
You'll be fine
So in my love for you
I can not try
Tobi Jul 4
God, I got nothing to do
But let me get one *****
Just one would do
Do do do do

Ohh, I'm nothing
But that's fine
Cause baby
I've got nothing to do

I'm just a loner
Playing videogames
Reading boring manga
All day and night

I got a big room
Just waiting for a crew
And maybe a babe
Yeah, I'm a fool

Ohh, I've got nothing
But really man
What can I
Really do?

I'm always in my room
Doing what healthy boys do
I use myself
Since I can't use you

It's honestly boring
It's really sad
That I got a lot
But no one cares

I can do a lot
Let me prove myself
But you won't care
That's only for you and yourself

Oh, I need nothing
Because, man
I used to having
A little or none

Da de da de da dum
La da da de da dum
La la da le da dum
Hum dum dum dum

Hum... I've got nothing
But my manga, my movies
Zines and games
(But maybe I need a babe)
Jul 4
'45 '25
Tobi Jul 4
As the guns go blazin'
And bombs keep fallin'
I wonder what life was
80 years ago
What time it was

Oh...they hated my black skin
But at least my masters
Fought for freedom,
Peace and love
(How charming)

They go about
In their armored beasts
And instruments of pain
Reigning destruction on
The human race

But now I wonder
What will we do?
This oh so wonderful
Sweet-lovin'
Generation of mine

We dare not think
Of the death of our fellow man
But we crowd ourselves
And beckon forth
To fan the flames

Of war, and death and destruction
The pigs in their ivory towers called
And still call upon generations
To sacrifice, to die
For the country we so love

But I wonder,
I truly wonder
When it really matters
Who will bear the cost
Of our death and misdeeds?

Oh, women shall cry
And men of iron shed a tear
Daughters too
For there goes our sons, our brothers
And lovers
To death they now knew

And I wonder what they'll do
When I join them very soon
What can I do?
I'm just a tool , yes a tool
A government mule

And yet I raise my banner
And I march on, I really do
AK in one hand, a machete in the other
On the beach, in the air, in the city
In the jungle, the snow and sands

At the highest peaks
And lowest valleys
In tundra and in heat
I say truly to my country,
"It's an honor to die for you."
Jul 4 · 118
Lovesong
Tobi Jul 4
I remember that night
It was full of light
People laughed
And I smiled

You walk to me
A shining smile
Ear to ear
A face of tall tales

You took my hand
I looked into your eyes
I was drawn
But then I realized

Your charm, your grace
I was almost entranced
But I knew clearly
This wasn't right

You're too old
I'm too young
But you tried
To force down your tongue

I cried,
Yes I cried,
You leave me,
"You're not mine"

You were too strong
I was too weak
You dragged me
By my pant's seams

We were in bed
Your fingers on me
But oh Lord
I make my plea

She forced me
She told me
No one would care
No one would try

Besides, I'm a guy
She's a gal
If we were tried
They'll say:

"Why didn't you try?
She's just a woman,
You're a fool,
A disgrace"

I'm not her man
I'm not a man
Just some boy
With a broken wing

She was my Lord
She was the Queen
Me?  Well...
Just a pleb

So it didn't even matter
Cause why not?
She's reclaiming the power
Her people lost

January 5th,
I walk to my room
Breathing in the cold air
For it will be my last

A rope around my neck
Tears in my eyes
I told the truth,
But they said it was a lie

Now I call Death,
Oh beloved Death
To take me
As her lover

The pain was too much
The insults too many
I'm a man
They say in envy

I shall never fly
I shall never soar
She clipped my wings
My lust, my soul

I breathe my final breath
Lord forgive me,
But after her
I know hell
May 27 · 67
The General
Tobi May 27
His men still,
All at arms,
Young of age
Not readied for all harm.

"Fire the artillery,
Send for the Calvary,
Get them there,
Hold the line!

Die not for yourself,
A simple trade:
Life for eternal glory,
No soul is wasted,
In these fields of death"

He watches, he waits
He thinks, he stumbles
All in vain
As his plans fall the drain

"What now?" they say,
All is lost, none stand,
Great autumn orchids
Stained red
With youthful pride and vigor,
Gone for a pointless dream.

Guiding hand
To earnest and certain doom,
He sits on a throne of corpses,
Wasted genius, wasted effort,
All for naught, all far gone.

Tactician, intellectual,
Butcher, fool
Hero, Angel,
Villain, Devil,
A man of no equal,
A man of all folly,

A leader and a killer,
A man , in his hands
The hopes of nations
And empires,
A man with no where to go,
"There's nothing we can do.",
He says at last,
"Here's my Waterloo ; all is lost.".

As he stands in surrender,
Both flawless general
And flawed man.
May 27 · 123
If Only
Tobi May 27
I got a new suit
A new Rolex
A new Dodge
For you
A bouquet glowing bright

I had as well a ring
It seemed like gold
It was so bright
But it couldn't compare
To your light

I was ready
To show you a new life
Make you my wife
I said to myself
"I'm gonna make it right."

But then I saw,
That's when I knew
I missed, how sad
I couldn't have you
I didn't even put up a fight

But whatever
I guess
Besides, I said after,
"I'll have a coke,
Cause I'm alone tonight."

At the bar,
Music rang
With sailors in hand
And then I realized
I had no life

I am alone
I am forgotten
But that's alright.
May 27 · 50
Boy Meets Girl
Tobi May 27
He's just a wallflower
Wilting by the hour
Has no life
And is always sour

He's hooked
He's turned
Can't stop himself
From enjoying it more

That 'it' ?
He is ashamed
Ashamed to talk
Ashamed to say

Degrade himself
Damage himself
Yet he seeks love
He craves feeling

She is not a person
She is an idea
She is perfection
She is an escape

She is his dream
The love he wants
The affection he seeks
A companion he can adore

He spends nights
Looking into nothing
But her light
Her glowing light

He looks at her
As God
And him devil
The shadow to her light

The joy he could have
That he chased her
Sought her
But no avail

He tried, tried
Traversing through
Halls and classrooms
Cafeterias and stories

Lovers lane?
Walks not there
Student Center?
Far from him

It doesn't matter
Who she is
She's his fix
His salvation

She's the reason
His temptation
The purpose of life
And her gone means death

Oh...oh why?
Why won't there be
The one I call  she?
One for me

He finally tries,
But she's not his
She's everyone's
And no one's

Lover to me
Lover to you
All have enjoyed her
One way or two

And thus,
He resides in his fate
He will never meet Girl
Before it's too late
Teen Romance love life
May 27 · 113
Lantern
Tobi May 27
Bright, yet far—
Shining light
I hold dear,
A sacred soul.

A guardian ember,
Luminous as it is—
A heavenly beauty
Yet to be seen.

In darkness, I call:
Canopus, Moon, and Sirius—
Only they I adore,
Only them do I long for.

A path I trek
Only I can see.
The stars shine
To guide me.

A lantern, this lantern—
Only it compares
To the starry night
That I yearn for.

That heaven embraces earth,
That light shines
Even when darkness lurks.
For that, I seek
To call peace.
May 27
A Prayer
Tobi May 27
God, I'm too tired
Please let me join you
God, my father
Please let me go

Mom, please don't cry
Because I want to go
Sister, do not frown
You'll be better without me

Grandma, thank you
Dad, I love you
But I'm not sure
Of my existence

God, take me now
Let me embrace
The icy grasp
As death beckons

God, comfort those
Who'll miss me
When I finally
Have my peace

God, I'm tired
God, I'm done
Let me go
Let me drown

Take me to where
I'll be accepted
Either pearly gates,
Or scorching flames

God, embrace me
Forgive me
But this life of mine
Is truly empty
May 27
Nothing
Tobi May 27
I want nothing
I do nothing
I speak of nothing
I am nothing

I run myself
Ground into ash
Just to prove
I'm the one you asked

I am simply a tool
A piece in your design
The key to your light
Accentuating my shadow

A void I'm filled
Of grief and unbelief
That there's always
Someone greater

There's someone smarter
Someone stronger
Someone more charming
Or someone just better

I look in awe
How can you be so good
While I can do so little?
Why didn't I become you?

I see you
I hear you
You have life
You have a voice

For me, there's
No story on my lips
Or a flame in my heart
Just a vessel

A vessel to be felt
Filled by your goals
I'm your fool
And your the star

I am alone
I am forgotten
Not one I call
Or cherish for something

It's fine
I have many friends
Because I'm silent
Because I don't try

Well, I've tried. I've tried.
**** it! I've tried!
My twinkle was disposable
Because no one needed it

All I did
Was waste my time
Waste my joy
Waste my future

I did nothing
I see others
And I feel envy
How are you so merry?

How are you this?
How are you that?
Why go on your knees?
Why bow your heads?

I tried that as well,
But they'll never understand
They'll never know
They'll never appreciate me

Know of what you wonder?
I'm an addict
I'm a fraud
I'm a disease

A virus
That leeches off good
A soul
Trapped in an abyss

A walking corpse
A silent death
A study of void
A dirge of humanity

I want to die!
I've tried! I thought!
But didn't
I couldn't

Because I'm a coward!
Look at me!
I'm nothing
And a coward!

Death creeps for me
Calling me to where
I'll sleep, finally rest
Close my eyes to be blessed

I embrace the void
The sorrow, the pain
Please God
Let my spirit be drained

There's no bliss
There's no anguish
I hate my life
Let me vanish

Even Death
Might not want me
Please Death
Take me

Once I die
I'll smile
Then I'll know
If I was nothing

— The End —