Tess - Hello Poetry

Oct 2018

Demons

“The Solution.”

Suicide.

One Word. A Million Cries.

#depression #depressed #suicide #heartbroken #broken #deep #abuse #sad

Tess Oct 2018

Stockholm Syndrome

A normal day
Walking through the park
When suddenly grabbed by the waist

You throw me over your shoulder
And run
To your van

You throw me in the backseat
And tape my hands and mouth
And start driving

I'm mesmerized
By everything
That just happened

You drive fast,
And reckless,
A really long distance

When we finally arrive
At your house
You push me into a room

You look at me now,
And laugh,
Menacingly

You punch my face
And kick me hard
You spit on me

I don't even scream
Or cry
But just stare at you

Every time you touch me
And hit me
I start liking you even more

Somehow, the way your touch
Makes me feel,
Is a feeling of home

As each day passes
Your hits grow worse
My body is bruised and broken

But my love for you isn't.
I long for your hand ******* my face
And your spit on my body

I'm not a victim of kidnap and abuse,
But rather, one of Stockholm Syndrome.

Tess Oct 2018

Silly Tadpole

Silly tadpole
Swimming in his tank
Keeping races with his friends
And enjoying while he can

Silly tadpole
Suddenly with the urge to jump
Up an out of the tank
To go discover the world outside

Silly tadpole
Bidding goodbye to his friends
And taking a breath
And finally the big leap

Silly tadpole
Lying on the floor
Suffocating and dying
Wishing he never did that

Silly tadpole
Wriggling on the floor
Taking his last breath and realizing
He wasn't ready for the world yet.

This is something very different and weird. I thought I'd give it a try.

Tess Oct 2018

Nearing the end.

Voices in my head
Shadows everywhere

I'm curled up all alone
In the darkness of my room

I can feel the demons next to me.
They keep chanting

The same words until I give in
"Die" "Die" "DIE" "DIE"

"Okay"
I finally whisper.

I've given up.
They've won.

The tallest of them stands up
And comes near me

He smiles all creepy and whispers,
"Ready?"

I nod
While tears run down my face uncontrollably

He lifts his hand up
The one holding the knife

And brings it down
And stabs me in the heart.

I whisper
"Thank you"

Before falling over
And my heart stops beating.

I'm losing my battle. I doubt I'll make it out alive.

Oct 2018

Lost Soul

Dear Depression

Just when I'm about to have hope
My breakdown are less
I finally learning how to cope
You start to make your way in again
I try hard to pray you away
But you're here before amen
Welcome back old friend
I'm a fool to think the last time
that I saw you was the end
You brought gifts with you
I wanna ask which ones
cause the demons brought some too

Did you send the voices in my head?
I don't like them
They say I'd be better off dead
You didn't sent them right?
You would miss me
Who would you hold at night?
Did you send the bile?
It burns, I start to skip meals
I hide my pain with a smile
Did you cause the sleepless nights ?
Where you mad you weren't there
to hold me from the light?
Did you send the dreams?
That either crunch my soul
or make me scream ?
When I wake up my heart hurts
I hold in my tears
Until they threaten to burst

I shouldn't have left you
I wanted to be happy
I thought it was the right thing to do
I've learn my lesson
I need to stay with you
Let go of my aggression
Don't worry its not too late
Everything can go back to when
You were my soulmate

Depression is my soulmate pt. 2

#depression #sad #abuse #abusiverelationship #anxiety #eatingdisorder #help #soulmate

Oct 2018

Logun Alexander Johnson

Memories.

They say a person's past, determines who they are.
What if, I can't remember my past?

In the end, It will all fit together.