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  6d Lost Soul
If I die today,
Would tears flow,
like a rushing river?
Or the clouds weep,
screaming in thunder?
Would the earth break,
shaking in anger?
Will the world care?
And for a moment,
forget laughter?

If I'm down
to my final heartbeat.
Will anyone be there,
sitting beside me?
When I draw,
the very last breath.
Will you hold my hand,
and feel upset?

If I go,
without saying goodbye.
I want you to know,
that I really tried.
To live and love,
to endure and smile.
To find the truth,
in this realm of lies.

If I'm fated
of leaving soon
to talk with God,
in his glowing room.
I'll be rejoicing,
when I face my doom.
Even I end like a flower,
that withered,
before it blooms.

If inside the casket I lay,
Would there any heaven for me to stay?
Or will my sins, demand me to pay?
Don't even know, how much this life has weighed.

If it's my time, to step on the scale.
Done of my part, in this play.
A lot of regrets,
but nothing more to say.
Wish me luck.
If I die today.
sometimes i look at suicide notes as inspiration  
and anorexia stories as instructions
but don't worry
I'm just sad
i love true crime, Corpse Bride, sad poems, and dead flowers
but ... don't worry
I'm just happy
i stuff my true feelings, thoughts,and desires till it crushes me
but dont worry.....
I just love you
  Feb 7 Lost Soul
The guilt
Weighs me down
I block out the memories
Yet I’m still drowning
Barely able to breathe
As mistakes
Wrestle me to the ground
Gripping my thoughts
Restricting my words
I stutter out
I’m so sorry
For who knows what
Lost Soul Feb 7
I've been there before.
Where you are so hollow.
When you cant even feel the tears boil up
because you've cry so many times that your numb.
I just stare off as my world blurs and disappears in front of me
Lost Soul Feb 6
this is goodbye
I'm not a joke
I'm **** of your rants
stop telling me this lie
you dont love me
you love what I do for you
as long as I am
what you want me to be
...i cant do this anymore
i cant bottle my feelings
hide in my room
just to avoid going into war
I have to leave
i need to find my wings
and finally be able to breath
if i stay here
im gonna lose myself again
and see someone else
in the mirror
Eyes bloodshot from hours of crying
stomach acid burning
my hair a messs ... I stopped trying
I will get better.. I have to
this isnt living ,its existing
but if this is what you want
then I wish the best for you
  Feb 6 Lost Soul
The more depressed I get
The happier I act.
I have cuts on my wrist
But a smile on my face
And that’s all that really matters, right?
As long as I smile for the picture
Everything’s alright.
It’s so easy
To hide  behind simple lies
“I’m okay” I lied
“It’s alright” I cried
“I’m not mad” I denied
It’s better this way...
So what if I’m utterly crushed
So what if I’m contemplating suicide
No one will see my cry.
Lost Soul Feb 5
why is it when Im sad you are glad and when I'm glad then you're mad?
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