I have a few questions for you...

Did you know that we weren't strong enough?

Growing up, girls always pictured themselves having a perfect boyfriend.
Someone they can be so proud of and be comfortable with, no matter what the circumstances are.
Did you picture this as well?

Do you believe that we are supposed to be with one person for the rest of our lives?

Let me answer the last question...

Nothing is permanent.

We tried so hard with the illusion of permanence.
We forgot we need to fall inlove with each other everyday.
We end up taking advantage of the comfortable feeling we have.

Those days where we talked to each other almost the whole day
The never ending fun, though somehow nonsense conversation we have
All those stories we have shared to each other
The planned getaways, the corny jokes,
the dramas, the fights, the obstacles
that we have to endure to be together
And all the laughters we have
Remember those?
Because I can't forget those.

If this is really the end,
Here's my advice for you
Live for yourself.
Believe in yourself
You're a very strong woman
I wouldn't regret that you became my girl
I hope you find someone
who can make you as happy as i made you
when we were deep inlove
And maybe or just maybe
We can reconnect in the future
and i can make you just as happy as
the first day you've known me

So, dear my future ex girlfriend
The odds of us breaking up is 50:50 and,
i hope that you will never have to read this.
But if you do, I want you to know that I'll always love you.

I could never tell you
exactly what's going on inside my head,
so I'll write instead.
Drown my thoughts in paper & lead.
Keep my hands alive,
and my expression dead.

I wish I was asleep
I hate being awake

Because it’s *****
I feel like I’m emotionally stuck

I got the worse luck with love
Either that

Or a serious case of bad luck
I wish I was sleep

So I could dream of a better me
Someone who’s always joyful and happy

Sometimes I just want to close my eyes
Permanently

But not to prey
Because sense you’ve been gone
I’ve misplaced my faith

You might think that I’m just,
Lazy

But give me a break
I just hate to be awake

Metal
Or steal

Aluminum
Or tin

No longer coated with silver
I remember I use to shine

But now I’m covered in rust
And invaded by the weeds of the earth

Frozen in place
Can’t move my face

Dreams of me stretching out my limbs
But cursed never to move

I pray to the sun
And scream at the moon

I’m cold to the touch
Inside, an empty shell

Press your ear against my tin frame
Knocked on my chest

Echos is all you’ll hear
Peak into my rotted holes

No heart would appear

I mean well
But I can’t stop my mind

I want to be left alone
Not because of you

Because loneliness is what I’ve always known
Currently how I am

I don’t deserve happiness
And happiness is a package deal that comes with you

Visions of us hugging, cuddling
It plagues my thoughts

You’ve invaded my mind
I must stay away from you

That’s what the saddens in my heart say
But my conscious wants you to stay

I don’t know what I should do
So I do what I always do

I’ll distance myself
And hope I don’t lose you

Assume everyone will betray you and you will never be disappointed

-Tobias Beckett

What burden thy mind could be
if you spread out your origin,
and what grief shall you gain on thee
if the desert you made shall bring it's mean.

"you can't fill my heart"
he says:
"I'm an ocean"

beneath the blue-clear sky
it is my heart
fulfilled with dreams
and no more dry.

and in the sea
as you come far, deep and deep,
I tell you now:
you cannot be
my final drip.

and how can you seek
my heart to clip?
if I'm everywhere
so I am here, my dear.

"you cannot hide from world"
he says:
"the world is everywhere"

between million colored bunches
under colored boundless sky
there you lay behind your fences
too afraid to cross it by
your heart, is in chains
and not because your wilderness
but because of your faded blaze.

and, in desert, where you lay
you're alone, as if you say
all this sand is lonely too
made from one
no more than two.

here you blame
your eternal forsakenness
and you have drown
the sand forgiveness.
you're alone, but maybe why?
in this coldness, desert dry
where your stain's beneath its glamour
and your soul stretched by behaviour.

and the world it's made of sand
fulfilled by her baked ground
where you lay behind your garden
blaming her for your own scandal.

so you see
the boundless desert
with its sand,
outstretched and
feeling its bay.
but instead
of carrying mountains
when he knows that he shall fail,
he is here,
approaching cereals,
making love
and endless sail.

and the sorrow you have made
hiding just behind your fence
you should know that you shall fade
if you'll still lay in your own trance.