My vices,
my love for all things
That treat me nicely.
Maybe it’s just for
the moment.

A cigarette will do
or some ****.
A drink to keep me
company.
A book to keep me
busy.
A Girl to look at
and adore in
all her beauty.

Now I’m thinking about
Gambling.
The thrill of not knowing
And betting everything
On a hunch.
I guess life
is a gamble.

My bad habits,
my vices,
how I love them
Even though they
**** me.

I’ve got nothing
For you.
I wish I did,
You know I don’t.

I hate love songs,
They sound like misplaced
Feelings of a young boy.
A boy who doesn’t understand
That things change
And some wounds
Can’t be healed with bandages.

So I turn of the radio
Cause I don’t want to think
About you.

We move to an unheard
Rhythm.
I chase you through forgotten
Memories.
You find me,
Alone and confused.
Wasted of cheap liquor,
Trying to drown my thoughts,
Trying to **** the pain,
And remember your face
As you smiled to me and said
Everything will be alright.

My heart is going to stop
beating
any moment now.
As I try to keep
up
with the current of life.
Reading books
and poetry,
dancing at clubs,
smoking cigs
at parties,
taking shots until
I'm rolling on your
carpet.
You see I'm living
a lifestyle that bound to
catch up with me.

My heart beats
and time passes by
while I lie down on my
bed and stair at the ceiling.
Thinking of the
time I spent with you,
talking to you about
**** I didn't know
anything
about.
Yet you still listened.

My heart continues to
beat for no
other reason but
to keep me alive.
And I keep living
because I will not go
out quietly, I'll rage on
maybe cause
Dylan Thomas told me
to.
But his heart has stopped
now
and mine will one
day.

and asked why
it shines on a *******
sinner like me.
So he replied,
he shines on all,
the good, the bad,
and the **** of the earth.
Also the guy that lies around
and wastes
away in an endless sea
of *****.
He says he shines on all.

Then I thought I guess his just
another hippie,
with his embrace everybody
*******.
But who am I to decide
what he should do?
Who am I?

My therapist
told me I should
Be more positive
and
Stop focusing on the
Negative.

So I talked to some
Old friends and reminisced.  
Reminisced on how
we cheated in class,
Talked to girls
And did drugs
just to past time.

Maybe those we're better days.
Days when we had
some form of
Innocence.

Now I turn on the
News and all
I see is Isis, war, ****,
Mass murders and racist faces.
People telling me lies and
Convincing me on
what to believe.

Who knows, maybe trump secretly
Loves black people and Mexicans.

So much for
Positivity,
I should ask that
Therapist for my
Sixty dollars back.

Well your legs are
Beautiful.
Your watch Is simple
Yet priceless.
You face,
Elegant like prince
Harry'
Wife.
You style,
Well if I had
Words for it,
I wouldn't
Be a
college student.

I'm not kidding.

I'll love to
eat you out,
Then maybe take you
Out.
But I'm broke,
So maybe we could
Eat at home
And you can tell
Me why you hate your
Husband so much.

Maybe

"I daydream
Of romance,
I daydream
Of you."

The sun shows your
beauty.
The moon hides my
face.
Thankfully, because I
commit
unlawful acts.

I leave the church
to you.
Give me the bars,
pass me the joint.

Call me,
when your sad.
And I will
cheer you up.

It seems I’m only good
for that.
Laughs and giggles.

I should have grabbed your
hand.
Pulled you close to me
and lied.
Lied that I don't like blonds or
that one girl, with the blond
hair.
How romantic right?
Me staring into your eyes and
you're staring back.
But then you'll know the truth.
That I'm just a lost puppy
Looking for a home,
a place to stay,
a girl to listen
and some wine to drink.

But you can't know this
and you never will.
Instead you'll know half of it,
that I do like your hair and I think
about it all the time.
Brown with little blonde stripes,
I also like the way you talk, especially when you're drunk
without a care in the world.

****, now I sound like a *****.

you start to notice the
changes you go through.
How things come
in seasons
both the good and
the Bad.
So when you said
you'll never
talk to me again,
share you secretes
with me again,
or even love me again.

I was okay.
Because things come and
they go,
like the wave of the ocean.

You don't belong
to me and I don't
belong to you.
You wish I did
and I wish you did
but
that's all over now.
It's time to ride
the next wave.

What do you do,
When you feel helpless.
Unloved and unwanted,
I don't not know
I only know how to drink.
When I'm happy or sad.
But never unwanted,
Cause I'm never sober
Enough to know
What it feels like.

I should have grabbed your
Hand.
Pulled you close to me
And lied.
Lied that I don't like blonds or
That one girl, with the blond
Hair.
How romantic right?
Me staring into your eyes and
You staring back.
But then you'll know the truth.
That I'm just a lost puppy
looking for a home,
A place to stay,
A girl to listen
And some wine to drink.

But you can't know this
And you never will.
Instead you'll know half of it,
That I do like your hair and I think
About it.
Brown with blonde stripes.
I like the way you talk,
Especially when your drunk
Without a care in the world.

****, now you'll think I'm a *****
Spilling all this **** to you.
The truth is I like you
Mostly because you truly understand sacarsim.
And I can feel the
bitterness in the undertone of your
Voice.
Maybe I'm just projecting.

It's quite peaceful
To be in nature.
It's also gets
Boring cause nothing
Happens,
sometimes you need this.
Sometimes you need
*** and soda,
With some ice and a hing
Of lime.

It's like a dance,
You know.
Life seems to move
From good to bad
From bad to good.

It's a trip

And like all trips it
Has an end.
And also a middle
And maybe this trip comes
With free drinks, drugs
And love to go around.

****