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To my dearest love

now you're in heaven
forever you will run
joyful and carefree
a young girl having fun

always youthful
not growing old
never feeling pain
so I've been told

no more worry
not another sleepless night
you are with God
and all of His might

facing life
without you by my side
is a pain
impossible to hide

when I go to bed
I pray every night
that soon I will die
and go into the light

waiting for eternity
my beautiful bride
soon I'll be there
forever by your side

your beloved husband
 Oct 2016 The Poetry Peddler
L B
Behind the barn in late afternoon
Uncle Ray lifts my brother
to the seat of a harrower
abandoned now
and rusted to this field of family
tilted and monumental
plunging its tines into memory
of broken earth
behind this life of the workhorses they were
My father and my Uncle Ray—talking
Scattered conversation
in hushed tones

...as skyscraping thunderheads
slashed through their heights
by arrows of fire
light the pumpkins
between hay bundles
of time golden
One of my early memories.  I was three.  Between my first and second year,  memory begins for me-- mostly impressions and strong symbols that seem to float without time.  
My grandparents were gone, but my Uncle Ray still worked their small farm in Hatfield, Massachusetts, and we would drive up from the city on Sunday afternoons.  The house itself, was one of the oldest in New England, with the barn attached by a distinctive enclosure, to allow easy access to the animals in heavy snow, like the house described in Ethan Frome.
I'm cold
But I still care
I'm distant
But I wish you were here
My head and my heart don't go hand in hand
Unless that hand is strangling the other in demand
I'm hurting too but don't pity me
I need this, I know it, you know it, someday we'll see
If I get better and you do too
Maybe there's peace in this life again for me and you
All over the place but finally going somewhere
I am humbled by where I need to go
So I can go where I need to be
I hear someone following me
May it be god or a spiritual being
I am incapable of looking back
So I hope the universe cuts me off and takes the
lead
If not it's just me and the baggage full of could of bes
Holding me down as I drag it across the ground
At least my wine makes me drown
Only to make my eyes wide
To see it always was the devil next to me
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