The sun rises up and the sun sets down
But here i am wearing my heart with a frown
This christmas breeze frost the air
Like it frosted my heart having love thats so unfair

I walk in the aisles of madness and woe
asking myself do you think of me too?
I used to belong to this wildfire of yours
But i am just a human and i can no longer take the curse

My life would'nt be the same without you to break the ice
Moments of fire already gone in my eyes
But i still believe letting go of you is the right thing i should do
Having you still means i selfishly loves you

Thats why i have to wear a mask and keeps on pretending
dreaming im flying while my heart is already flooding
Flooding with grief and sorrow
Worrying myself what will happen tomorrow..

I used to confide to you all my heartaches and pain
But now i know i cannot do it again
Now i confessed my sorrow in the corner of the leaves of the trees
Letting it fly as the wind breeze

I am all alone now and still walking in the same path that i've been thru
Keeping all my heartaches and my moments of blue
letting myself to soar high along the shore
Keeping my secrets in the sand where my life has bore

My secrets that has been carried away by the wave
Where it made my love for you everlastingly unsaved
I know i have to stop this emotion in which i felt for you
like a fire in my heart where the wind has blew

Oh if i could only see you now!
In front of you i will make a vow
Vow to fight for my love for you even i know that is unfair
But here i am sitting wounded in a stair..

Creating a melody of my own
Building hatred for what my life had shown
But i know until the clock strikes at its last nine
I know inside of me i just cannot make you mine!

In the midday of the solemn hour
I halfly drunk my life so sour
Spent myself in a cabin of madness
In an hourglass..
Which sadness dwells in my whole soul
Where it takes me to the hypocrite paradise
As a whole i drown myself in a liquid of my youth
Where the trees are bare to its growth
Everytime it happens it cuts my life of root
Vanish every moment where my life has sought
Vanish all the battles that i have fought..

It takes all the part in me
A precious stone made of my only heart
Turned into an iron with a ceaseless fire
Creating a storm inside of me
Burning all my history
Unfolding all the devious angle in me
Such as a grass that is worthless to the society
Making me helpless like a worm wiggling in a sandstorm
Turning into a golden winged butterfly
Which then turned out to be a worthless trash fly
Thats how worthless i could be
As i drunk this bottle of agony..

In the middle of the night where i lie deeply awake
Dreaming about how my nightmares turned into my faith
How could it be?
I ask only me
I blame only me
I grieve only me
I once change this crazy path which i have been thru
Thinking that all of those leaves of misery were untrue
But was  it just deceiving my imagination?
Am i in my hallucination?
In my stupid illusion?
My own self betrayed a faith in me
Tell me, How can i trust anybody?

I ask the angel of misery what hath he done unto thee?
why am i suffering from such agony?
He answered me maybe i have lost the fortune of leaves within me
Maybe i have lost it as i drunk my hour left
Try to escape a lie which makes me defeated
I swear to you i did not deceive my sleep
Did not spill all the secrets i used to keep
I alone could only forbid myself in a bottle of madness
A bottle of grief and sadness which betrayed me
which used to be my friend but now turned unto my enemy!

The enemy that deceives me
An enemy that betrayed me
Build a hole in my soul and lost my sanity
I might have been sober that time
Might had not touched that ****** bottle of wine!
Might not commit such a stupid act
Might had realize the difference between a lie and a fact
But i am not!
There's a lot of doom which made me unlocked
The doors of forbidden curse!
Which made my living burst
Into like a firecracker in the sky
but only..
It brings my hundred smile to die..

The only difference between me and you is
That you'll be able to move on
And I won't.