It makes you deeply sick in a lot of ways,
And makes you happy before sad always,
It keeps your eyes open everytime and overtime.

You see it in the steps it takes,
You hear it in the sounds it makes.
Falling in with joy and hope, is it still a crime ?

Remind you how both of you got this far,
Remind you how both of you fell apart,
Do you really want it and share more than a taste ?

Can you give it enough space in your heart again,
With that risk and maybe getting hurt again !
You sure don't mind,  you learned from your past.

My father
Was a violent person
Hot tempered, serious, tense.
Always, always tense.

I tried to deny it
But deep inside
I feared him.

Whenever I sensed a sudden change in his eyes,
A sudden flicker of anger on his face,
And even a sudden thickness in the air,
The fear kept creeping back

It was not the alcohol
That turned him into a monster.
Just how, in the right mind of a person,
Punch his wife,
Tear her hairs out of her scalp
And leave her body with bruises?

Just how, in the right mind of a person
Abuse his wife in front of his daughter,
Nonetheless of her daughter’s presence?

He’d hurt me too sometimes
When I tried to intervene,
To save my weak mother away from his grip.

He never apologized.
Not even once.

Propositions about
the afterlife are futile.

Do you believe in God,
heaven, clouds, harps and cherubs?

And then you die and discover
that you must lead many more lives
searching for perfection.

Do you believe in the Bardo,
in reincarnation, in the sweet
possibilities of getting it right?

And then you die and find yourself
on a fluffy cloud surrounded by
annoying cherubs whose harps are incessant.

Or will you become a mute patch of earth,
that is wet and dry and favored by worms.

I have closed the eyes of the dead
and all I can tell you is they were dead.

What happens after is futile surmise.

You believe or you don't.

But believing is not knowing.

And when you know, you will not say.

~mce

Night hands drenched in metal
Rings in the heart of desire
Dragons love more than you
With cold gleaming talons
Burn the coal along my fur
Humble hearts this eve

Singe

Whining sights stared
Claim three fears
Chaos gently cleared the fake
Breaking wrists haunt my strength
Lonely lives tonight

Creak

Hear last howls melt
Longer than my heart falls
Lying skin and deceiving souls
Rake your worst upon my soft side
Nash your steel teeth into my muzzle
Tell me I'm worthless
Pathetic
Useless

Don't you think
I already know what I'm worth?
Pretend that you've written something golden
I have no true value

Jfksoznaba;;1-66

I've  just smashed my keyboard to smithereens to depict anger, I've plugged in my old one now. I thought the other would survive longer....

A fruitless endeavor.

A six pack of Guinness to help me be whole again,
But once I sober up, I'll just be a lost soul again,
Few women in my heart, and none within my sight
And they'll be going out so we'll all get ****** tonight
As for me ya see, I'll just drink myself silly
For I must **** these brain cells, before they **** me

He's a  man with a 150IQ and is dissatisfied with all his life choices.