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Sara Barrett Jan 6
The shoreline stares back at me—
Almost tasting it,
A distant, golden line lies ahead.

The tide is like a clenched fist,
Tightening around my ankles,
Dragging me down even further.

I tell myself I know this sea.
I have swum through it before,
Charted its depths,
I felt its pull, outlasted it.

But today, the water rises,
My chest feels the pressure.
Salt and silence fill my mouth,
Despite my kicks, the current grows stronger.

The waves swallow my screams.
Like a storm, PMDD surges—
No warning, no mercy.

My ribs tear,
Its voice floods my mind—
Why bother fighting it? Let go. Sink.

I claw at the water,
Not from strength,
But from fear—
This time, maybe I won’t make it.

Rage consumes me.
I rage that I can’t trust my own body,
That my mind betrays me,
Dragging me under,
While the world above remains calm.

Even as I sink, somewhere—
I feel it:
The part of me that will not drown.

She remembers the taste of sand,
The heat of sunlight was on her skin.

She will not let go.
Not now. Not ever.

The shore is still there,
Even if I can’t see it now.
I will rise to meet it.

My power is inevitable.
Sinking, But Rising is an emotionally charged exploration of the internal turmoil many women face, especially those experiencing PMDD, perimenopause, or the challenges of motherhood. The poem sheds light on the often misunderstood and invisible struggle of living with hormonal shifts that feel like a battle between mind and body, where women are unfairly labeled as "crazy" or "overreacting." It brings awareness to the lack of support, proper education, and understanding from society and medical professionals when it comes to women's reproductive health, especially during transitional years. The poem serves as a powerful reminder that while the tide of hormonal imbalance can feel overwhelming, women possess an undeniable strength and resilience, even when it seems as though everything is pulling them under. It emphasizes that women are not at fault for their bodies’ betrayals and that, despite the struggle, they will always rise.
Jade Jan 2024
Shhh.

Stop crying.

Shhhhh!

Better cover that mouth of yours. Or else they’ll hear.

Shush!

The power’s come back on, the darkness can’t  protect you anymore.

Enough!

That’s a good girl. Now, let’s see a smile.
There’s a beast inside of me
But she’s not who I am
And she’s not who I want to be
Daphne Nov 2017
please, you have to understand,
this isn't me.
i am not my mood swings,
i am not my fear of talking on phones.

please, you have to understand,
this isn't me.
i am not my depressive episodes,
i am not my medications i must take.

please, you have to understand,
this isn't me.
i am not my fear of eating,
i  am not my fear of being replaced or ignored.

understand, i am not my depression.

understand, i am not my anxiety.

understand, i am not my PMDD.

understand, i am not my BPD.

understand, i am not my eating disorder.

please, you have to understand,
this is me.
i am my love of cats,
and i am my admiration of everything musical.

please, you have to understand,
this is me.
i am a lover of stationery,
and i am a lover of every single living creature.

please, you have to understand,
this is me.
i am one who eats one too many brownies,
and i am one who cares for the entirety of the environment.

please, see past my mental disorder(s).
see the real me,
not just the chemistry in my brain.

please, see my lust for life.
see me beating stereotypes,
see me being me.
I know that this is quite the bit long, but so is my journey.
Joy Oct 2016
I'm still miserable.

don't get me wrong -
there are pauses, and there are breaks.
there are beams of light, there are glimmers of hope
and there are days where happiness is so golden,
I can practically feel it salting on my tounge,
dancing in my brain
and some small part of me almost begins to believe that
things have changed -
it's going to be better now.

but of course, night is still well and alive,
in it's deathly gloom.
and of course, the petals always plunge through
in a sickening cold snap
and I am brutally reminded that
spring
is just season, not a way of life.

and although the why is given a different name -
boys, alcohol, displacement, bad job -
i find myself surrending to the currents
that is winter days, where sunlight
burns to cold, midnight ash within a few hours.
every few weeks or so, the darkness returns
pinching out the flame that i had spent so much time trying to reignite and
oh, not again.

but again and again, the night falls,
the stars spiraling out of place until
the cold and the heaviness have anchored in my chest
like a yawning need for eternal day -
I'm suddenly left wondering if i should even fight it.
October, 2016

— The End —