everything seems so plain, dull, almost lifeless
all I see are preoccupied shells
not a single soul listens
so I sit here
with this brush in hand,
ready to dash
and I take off the scarf to adjust

all I am is a creature walking on shards of glass, hoping to find a new path instead of the crooked bridge I’ve tried to fix

pick me up

i drag my corpse once again

back to the ground

gravity, why are you greedy?

hay and lilac grass

i want to sleep peacefully

to put it bluntly

i crash and sleep

momentum shifts and careless lips

put me back to where

the child plays with vehicles

ramble about the past tense

i wish i wish i could have

i should have

butter bitter better borrow blunders

i am sailing

no not the sea because the sea

it is where i instead of floating

the sea is where i choke suffocate

my hands hoping pleading

for that sweet gulp of oxygen but

i drown

i always drown

and it is not gravity at fault

i am at fault for my own tragedies

so i'm sorry gravity

please forgive my existence

take my short term breaths

and bring me back to the ground

that is where i belong

the dust filled pavements

compared to a sea

where the ground is non-existent

for my desperate feet to lay or stand on

Take a moment to imagine what peace could bring
A bountiful future, loyal companions and a dash of rainbow
Perfectly structured, don't you think?
Let's take this further
Glance at the one sitting next to you
What do you see?

A grey, demented mist of acquiescence enveloped its upper body
You watch that selfish shadow take over and now
As you talk to the shadow
Asking for a reassuring nod
What do you see?

An odd grin, you see
The shadow is oblivious and responds to the strange smile
Of a sinister clown
The clown takes the shadow
Placing its yellow smudged hand
On the oblivious shadow
Soon, you'll see

The shadow is gone
The clown is not grinning
It has a scarf, a blue scarf
Surrounding its neck
Blank background and colors are whispering
There is a moment of regret and fear

As if the scarf was not rude enough
A glimmering knife joined the party
The clown held the knife tightly
But, what type of scene can your eyes see?

A struggling tear escapes the eye of the clown
Pointless, it was
He now walks to the stage along with the scarf
On the stage, the shadow cried
Your eyes can't help and so you wonder
Indeed, the knife was no more

It's 10:30 and I'm typing this down. Yes, I am thinking of you. I think of you before I sleep and I think of you when I wake up. I miss you quite more than I show you when we meet. If I could, I would have never let you go. I would have held you then kissed you until you run out of breath or possibility to the point where you can't feel your lips anymore but just mine. I want to make you mine in all ways possible. And believe me, I will. That's why I'm looking forward to someday. Someday we'll have those adventures, we'll travel, we'll try new things. We'll get lost and scream at the top of our lungs. We'll forget what we left behind and just be with each other. Talk about the most random things, talk about the things that matter most. Or maybe not talk… maybe just lay under the stars me in your arms, doing things till we fall asleep... I want to know what bothers you. I want to know how you view the world. I want to explore you and dive in you. In your embrace, in your voice, in your smell– in my solace. Please take me away. Please save me from my thoughts. I imagine great beautiful things of how our someday would be but I also have these thoughts that won't let me sleep without me talking to you. I'm sorry if I bother you. I'm sorry if I am. I hope you find time to not be lazy for me. I hope you'll be patient with the ever clingy girl who loves you very much. I hope that I make you happy. I hope that I'll always be the only one even if there are a lot of girls where you are. I hope you believe that we can make it until someday. I hope that you love me too. Because my thoughts are killing me thinking of the possibility that you might not feel the same way anymore. I may be tired, but I guess I wouldn't be with you. I hope you're sleeping well right now. I hope you dream of me. I hope and pray and wish. Good morning, my solace. I am overthinking again. I wish I can make it stop.

Does everyone else overthink?
I over-analyse everything,
Every little thing that people say,
As  we proceed through each day,
Horrors! I gained an ounce!
And you look full of bounce!
FU** we're going to die fat and alone!
And we'll all get gallstones,
Listen to all my inner moans,
I'm overthinking again, you see,
There should be an overthinkers' society!!