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I guess some people
has to put up a front
that is hard to smash
but is known to a few
They are those
who has experience on the stage
and can manipulate
you into thinking
of what he wants you to think

*but never the truth
chuckae Jan 2015
What is this that I feel
Like drowning in life
And living in dread?
That when the words
I am supposed to keep
I give away?
What is this that I feel
Whenever I dont even
Want to feel?
That slices through it
All, everything yet
Means nothing?
What is this that I feel
When I dream it to
Be a dream?
But in truth it is
A nightmare that I
Cannot wake from?
What is this that I feel
Obliged to say I don't
I don't care all,
Even though I know
Deep down that
I do?
What is this that I feel
That I can't handle?
That I want to forget?
It chews at my my heart
Threatening to beat to death
And yet..
What is this that I feel?
Today is my birthday... And I don't know. I don't care. It's awful, but good.
It's hard to breathe
And weird to touch
I was acting so normal
And I was thinking too much

Trying hard
To figure out
Moving onward
Engulfed in doubt

Don't look back
Too much pain
And in fact
Nothing to gain

Filled with knots
Wasted time
I got a penny for my thoughts
When I deserved a dime

Who's to say what's true
I never said I was right
Guess I never knew
It's not worth the fight

Thinking about before
Don't know who I was
Could have closed the door
And never been an "us"

Said you would stay
Promised you could
Chose to walk away
I knew you would

Everything was fine
Said we'd never part
Knew it was a line
But gave you my heart

I'll take the blame
I've always known
I played your game
You lost alone

I know you know
There's more to give
You were a stepping stone
I have a life to live

Hard to love
Weird to trust
Acting typical
Think it was lust

You told me to be strong,
Then you left
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