I think of my best friend and know that she is the person who will be there for me, even when I can't be here for myself who will CHEER me to my greatest heights and who will console me when I've fallen down. She will STAND UP for me and LIE DOWN beside me. She will FORGIVE me when I've hurt her and will occasionally, even bite her tongue when she could have easily said " I TOLD YOU SO"

I might be a child
I might be crazy
But I think everybody deserves the same plate
Would you trade me for your life?
Would you believe me even when all evidence contradicts my words?
Tell me the worst thing you think I can do
Can you convince me that I am not wrong even when I feel bad?

Will I be able to find in you that friend that I need ……
Are you my friend in need or will you prove to be my friend indeed
If you don’t have faith in me, why then do you laugh with me
I feel scared because I am surrounded by phonies
Like though am In Hollywood
How then do I act when I have fake friends?

I had trusted but wasn’t trusted in return
I had cared but wasn’t cared for in return
You claim you love me
But behind you stab me
Why then should I love you?
Your words are like that of an experienced poet
Sweet and soothing
But in truth you are venomous

Do not get me wrong
You made me this way
You created this version of me I never knew existed
But I ask myself why then should I give you that right?
The right to mar or make me
In truth, I doubt you are worth my time
Fake friends don’t fall in my list of love

Trust when broken cannot be repaired
You lost the best thing that can ever happen to you
Now I wonder where these thoughts come from.
Are my words cruel or is it deserving?
I am in a state of confusion
Tell me where my faith lies
How then should I act with fake friends, I ask again?

You're my best friend
You're my glow
And come winter
You're my snow

You're my canvas
You're my paint
My arms are to catch you
If you faint

You're my oxygen
You're my air
When you have a problem
know I care

When you feel lost
And can't find the light
I'll be here
to help you fight

If some stupid boy
Gives your heart an ache
I promise his tombstone
Will not be fake

You're fourteen now
Eleven when we met
And over those years
You're the one I don't regret.

You're my best friend
And I love you
And come hard times
I know you love me too.

Our story that I tried so hard to write is coming to a close, babe you were my stronghold that my heart has now foreclosed.

I tried so hard to perfect the things we did and what we said, I wrote the letters over and over until I wished I was dead.

Page after page I would erase and rewrite, sentence after sentence my heart had less light.

You walked all over the pages and ripped out your favorite parts, you folded all the edges and broke my helpless heart.

I would come in running after you cleaning your mistakes, accepting your apologies I never realized you were fake.

You blamed me for your madness and said I was no good, but truly it was your fault cause I did all I could.

You broke all my smiles and you turned them to frowns, you took my happy life and turned it upside down.

I can’t take the pain you caused me or the images you left in my head, they all used to be happy until you said you loved her instead.

My fairytale ending wasn’t what I'd expected, I guess our love was never perfected.

I’m okay now we can say goodbye, I’m happy you left me, but the memories will always be mine.

Unamused, abused, inflicted by I
Distractions, that keep my heavy eyes alive
***, drugs, deep conversations keep me fed
This feels as real as pretend, driven by others for fuel I don't have
This must be the end
Nah, I'll never die,
I'll continue to tell myself so I don't amend my habits

Embrace these teenage customs that feel so unique
They aren't, but that keeps me in synch
Willingly letting denial be a trait, a style of it's own
That will take me out one day, I already have condoned