I
where has this happened before?
leave your shoes on at the door.
at the beginning
my lips were cold,
smothered down by an impending hold.
too scared to sing a song,
wouldn’t dream to sing along.
come dress up with me
take me outside
and dangle me over
your favorite waterfall.
i will drink from its rays
until they freeze up my pipes
and you fix them for me
without being asked.
behind the sky
is your house
and you invite me every day
II
but i will never visit you
because you are not really here
and your soggy smile
gets me upset.
by coincidence we made a bet
that was intangible for you.
although i should confess, Father,
even before the time capsule
cell eroded to the surface
and laid the past out as a hostage.
i never felt for you.
i never liked you.
i hate to admit it,
i always lied to you.
get away from you.
get away from me.
don’t come back
until i can come back.
i know it’s ******* you
but it’s crushing me whole
and now i’m blowing away
and the holes
in the net
are too big to catch me.
III
some days we can make it a game.
some days we microscope our pain.
wrap it up like bday presents
show it off like the pretty pheasants.
no that's a peacock
the boys are pretty
will i be pretty?
even though
it feels ******
i want to move somewhere woodsy
but i can’t go alone, oh
turn up the boom box
so it drowns out the
SCREAM
ING
