two (or is it three...?) weeks in to the overnight shift and never have i wanted to wash myself in the golden rays of that nearest star our sun more than i do now as the ineradicable cloak of night stretches itself over these my newly waking hours. this night i feel massive but diffuse, like the ghost of a glacier lingering amongst the scablands; nebulous and immense, like a short-circuited god-machine cannibalizing itself in a forgotten corner of the universe. the sleep is broken, the mind needs rest. the mind needs rest.
Always more than you deserve You cut your teeth Against all those brick walls Momentarily All sin here is absolved Into the lack of resolve Through the surface of my skin Tales of caution in reverse All confession Has been rehearsed Rehearsed againt the wind
I was anemic and you were O-. Life was draining from my eyes and you were my vital oasis. I needed you. You were right for me, right?
You were the universal donor to alleviate my sadness, and I accepted you without question. I let your blood consume my own. Because your blood was simultaneously filling me with oxygen, without you I couldn’t breathe. I needed you. You were right for me, right?
But for every drop of blood you contributed to my body, a new tear drop fell. Every drop of blood whispered a new insecurity. You filled me with your own self-doubt serving to emphasize my own. But not once did I wince at the pinch of the needle, or cringe at the sight of the IV. I needed you. You were right for me, right?
But so often times we fall for O- when we are AB+, because they feel right, because they seem perfect. And we fall because without those 6 quarts of blood we may cease to exist. We forget that our heart can beat alone without someone else’s name pumping through our veins. O- blood has common side-effects of insecurity and sadness that overpower the feeling of limited livelihood.