and i watched
while the spring breeze swayed the curtains
and a weak smile played on his lips
her eyes were closed
dark lashes fluttering gently
light snores escaping her mouth

he held her hand in his
and i couldn't help but to wonder
how could a love be so pure?

once you know something it's hard not to notice it
how his gaze seems to linger
how he hugs her as if he never wants to let go
how he stares just a little too long

how behind his smile
and in his eyes
for a fleeting moment
hopelessness
is all
you
see

look up.

watch
as the watercolours bleed into the canvas of the sky
see the freckles of stars and constellations
bask
in the momentary warmth that you feel, comfort; safety

it's beautiful isn't it?

see the white clouds
bright and ever so superior
stretching across the horizon
carelessly
the area that belonged to the dark seas
but no longer
ever since the clouds claimed their territory
smiling, careless clouds

believe
that the world we live in is like sugar
sweet and pleasant and utterly pure

pretend
that the sugar isn't crumbling
bit by bit
piece by piece
falling apart
dissolving into sticky, empty nothingness

look down.

see the cracks on the ground
tell yourself that they're only on the surface
shallow
that they can be easily mended with cement

(they can't.)

and rehearse
rehearse the parts you're meant to play
a good sibling, child, friend

person

act as though you put others before yourself
as though you think their happiness is more important than yours
as though you'd sacrifice your life
for them

because you're selfless, aren't you?

(you aren't.)

perform
the rehearsed banter and
the perfected smiles and
the expertly timed eye roll -- **** your head to the left squinted eyes
glare for half a second before rolling them

and watch the stars dissipate
disappear
as the haze clouds over it
from all the pollution
problems that we promised we would fix
and the sky soon settles into an eternal darkness
dry acrylic

look straight ahead.

see eyes and noses and lips
some familiar and others not
see sincere smiles and forced smiles
see the world we live in
beautiful and wretched and human

did we make it this way
or did it make us this way

see the people around us
the eyes and noses and lips that form faces
the sincere smiles and forced smiles that form images
we're all beautiful and wretched and human

and there's absolutely everything and nothing we can do to change anything

look up or down or straight ahead or whatever
just look

(maybe that's all we can really do)

just look
and see
and breathe

(breathe.)

and be

be beautiful and wretched and human
be everything you've ever wanted to be
or everything you've never wanted to be

it's okay to be okay
it's okay to not be okay
it's okay to just be

it's okay.