smell of you
on the road
it touches me
a shiver passes me
I look for you
green eyes in foreign faces
smell of you in the night
I stretch out my  hand
looking for your hot skin
under the cold sheets
empties
smell of you
invades me
pursued my senses
I caress it
I hug it
because I can’t hug you

today
my need for you
is unbearable
it's physical
it’s mental
you invade my mind
you own my body
the expectation of pleasure
vibrates inside me
ephemeral lie
I hate
the awareness
I cannot have you
my hunger will not be satisfied
I’m smashed
from the promise to let you go
unable to move
I'm tormented
full of you
just of you
I can’t
miss you
I can’t
die
I must have you
is I must  breathe

new distances
old silences
"come-hither" gleams
I can’t touch you
I can’t feel you
a mound of distorted truths
is separating us
we were just two steps from the top
our fingers were about to touch
but we fell
in the frosty mud of exhaustion
I  saw the light shift
concealed by ruthless grudges
rediscovered enemy
illusory belief of a yes

love
defeats me
you own me
no free will
you are my way

you don’t talk
yet it hurts me so much
your silences
badly concealed truths

a unfinished binary
the hands of a clock
locked to three
an old music box
covered with dust
a woman folded
into the shadow
broken
or just interrupted

the dawn tinged the horizon
and the illusion sprouts
like a gem
the ides of  March
inevitable
unbowed
it blossoms and grows
in the hourglass
time slips
careless
inexorable
the beat of my heart speeds
my breath is severed
the last grain of time
has settled on the load of my nostalgia
and the wait ends
every chimera collapses
in the emptiness of your absence
and the sun sets
darkness fascinates me
the numbness of sleep raises me
until the morning
and the vicious ritual
starts
again
and again
and you
you're not there