her way of venting is unique
other than poems
which is pretty normal
she thinks

while showering
she sits down
puts some background beats on high
and sings her heart out
it’s all improvisation
but it helps
a little

tonight
she sang of hurt and
staying alive
for her friend’s sakes
but never for her own

is she ok?
she doesn’t know

the outside world isn’t bad
in fact,
it is much more of a home to her now
even though the weather is cold and dry
and her lips are chapped and so are her eyes

the outside world is good
she can breathe out there
she comes and goes
maybe she walks half a mile
maybe she walks six

every time she comes back to the house,
though
so no one cares
she’s alright

she leaves for hours on end
then she comes back
eats
sleeps
school
out

home doesn’t always feel like home anymore
she thinks
not when presences are missing and
all she can feel within those walls is suffocated
that house cannot feel like home anymore
she thinks
she needs an out

it was a hard
long
day

she put up with it
of course
but it was a very very difficult journey to take
everyday is a very very difficult journey to take
gym english history art math spanish science
then home

the bus to school is loud
but the screams of students drown out
the voices in her head
so she never minds
she puts in an earbud
and listens to music
she still feels very tired

she felt so very tired
bags found refuge under her eyes
and the sahara desert on her tongue
she ate her breakfast
she drank her tea
she felt so very tired