There’s been a lot of nights 
recently

where the howling of the trees 
makes my soul feel at home

There’s been a lot of nights 
recently 
where
I remember that 
I am not stagnant

There’s been a lot of nights 
recently 
when
I’ve thought that 
this isn’t right 

but my mind circles back 
on its seventh time around

the round-a-bout

and I try not to get stuck

in the cal-de-sac of lies 

that this town 
is trying
to make me 

believe

Now days spent without cause,
Without things desired by my own heart,
Her presence always attached to mine soul,
Though her touch far from reaching.
Though now she being the integral part of mine mind,
Does she thus ever see mine heart or lacking of hers?
Mine lips sealed without words to utter the heart clear,
Or are this feelings so big enough to give out such fear?


Love or maybe the desire hers growing without deeds,
Why have I become a man whom hides his face?
Is this concealed love worth it?
Or will she ever see mine heart safeguarded from hurts?
Or should I even let her see through me?
Maybe I should give her a try and let it be.

Who will forgive me for the things I do?
With no special legend of God to refer to,
With my calm white pedigree, my yankee kin,
I think it would be better to be a Jew.

I forgive you for what you did not do.
I am impossibly quilty. Unlike you,
My Friend, I can not blame my origin
With no special legend or God to refer to.

They wear The Crucifix as they are meant to do.
Why do their little crosses trouble you?
The effigies that I have made are genuine,
(I think it would be better to be a Jew).

Watching my mother slowly die I knew
My first release. I wish some ancient bugaboo
Followed me. But my sin is always my sin.
With no special legend or God to refer to.

Who will forgive me for the things I do?
To have your reasonable hurt to belong to
Might ease my trouble like liquor or aspirin.
I think it would be better to be a Jew.

And if I lie, I lie because I love you,
Because I am bothered by the things I do,
Because your hurt invades my calm white skin:
With no special legend or God to refer to,
I think it would be better to be a Jew.

You weren’t listening to me
I know it to be true you see
Because you could not hear me
And not be in love with me.
I have told you carefully
What you have here in me
A person of total loyalty
And outrageous personality.

You could not have been listening
Because you were not hearing
The wonderful things I’m telling
And the joys that are here waiting
Waiting patiently and languishing
In the shadow of your evening
As the sun has begun lowering
And the moon has begun rising.

I sit in the shadows and I’m sad
Missing all the good times we had
Knowing something cannot be bad
When it has made me so very glad.
If you only missed me just a tad
I would be a much happier lad.
I fear our love was just a fad
And it’s serving to drive me mad.

I know you weren’t listening to me
Or you couldn’t behave callously.
You would be enchanted totally
And drawn to me quite helplessly.
Is it something else completely?
Some magic spell not from me?
Some disgusting magical sorcery
That drags you away forcefully?

Tossing and turning as I lie on my bed
But all these voices are screaming in my head
Stop! Please stop! I want to sleep.
Slowly, subtly, all these thoughts linger and creep.

Voices of the past saying,
'You can't make it.'
Voices of failure saying,
'Not outstanding. Go back and sit.'

Lies of the enemy are clouding my brain
Without God, by now, I'd be insane.
I'm remembering my mistakes and all
Unpleasant memories, they make me feel small.

My mind is a battlefield
But my victory has been sealed
I know I'll get through this
Because He is faithful. I am His.

No one can see how you feel.
people say the feelings deep within you should leave them alone.
showing feelings deep within is like playing with fire, you will get burned.
No one wants to show their feelings if they fear they will get burned.

I could never tell you what was on my mind
So I wrote every thing down on paper
Each passing day with you only made things worse
Because all the things I was too shy to say
Became too lengthy to write in one sitting
So I typed them instead

Then one day you kissed me
And all the things I tried so hard to hide
Spilled from my mouth
And I dare say
Into your heart