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 Sep 2016 eunsung aka Silas
Rj
Everyday the images come back
And everyday I want to throw up
And bang my head against something
Hard enough to make me stop feeling
 Sep 2016 eunsung aka Silas
Rj
To think I spend so many hours wondering if you're alright
How many hours I've put into making sure you know
That you are loved, you are cared for, you are good, you are valuable
And after all of the **** I have seen and been through,
You think it's annoying I complain?
Even though I rarely do.
Even though I hold everything in until it hurts my insides
You think it's annoying I complain?
Why else didn't you answer my question?
No wonder I stopped telling you what's wrong with me.
I guess I sensed your dissatisfaction with my venting.
And now
*Now I have no one
 Sep 2016 eunsung aka Silas
D
Hope
 Sep 2016 eunsung aka Silas
D
-

I could cry myself to sleep
If there were anything left to cry
It's been a while yet, still I try
To forgive you, it isn't easy
To trust is so much worse
To believe you wouldn't hurt me
I only hope
 Sep 2016 eunsung aka Silas
D
Hell
 Sep 2016 eunsung aka Silas
D
-

The hell we've been through
Yet, you're not religious
You don't see the difference
I don't feel forgiveness
Yet, we're still in this

Together
Don’t eat chicken noodle soup from a saucepan leaned back in a recliner
because your neighbor could hit his wife in the back of the head
with a cue ball and the cops might siren down your street
causing you to flinch and spill hot broth on your
chest;  I have a bone to pick with the coward.
lucky is the family
that can celebrate
more birthdays for their living
than for their dead
swans and swanettes
all clamoured to dance
with the cygnet's undesirable
admission's prance

they didn't know that this male
was such a bragging exposure
and would strip their secrets
leaving them without composure

a waltzing of blackmail
was called in his revelation
the lovely feathered ones
trust divulged as intimidation

they only saw the charade
of this not so perfect ballroom chap
who'd tell all if they were unwilling
to twirl on his spin's tap

in fear lived the honeys    
of his fox trotting troupe
as their private steps
would be made an open coupe
gives exquisite attention
speaks with grace
flowing through the room
touching everyone
Groundhog day
six weeks later
telling you your life story
though you might have just met

I tell my son be careful son,
(also reminding this heart of mine,
you'd better not walk that line)

Look in the eyes
there's a white light shinning
focused right on you
feels so good
easy to misjudge what you're seeing
easy to take for granted

The day it's going to come

The white light blinking out
The exquisite attention
somewhere else

(This heart of mine, I put on notice)
I also tell my son,
be careful.
He hugged me
Tears running down his face
I felt him shudder
For the whole human race

Just who condemned him
Has always been clear
The righteous
The believers
The possessors
Of fear

Yet sympathy
I felt
For the Devil
Himself
Because forgiveness
   Runs through my veins...
Traveler Tim

We pay our debt sometimes.
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