"The moon moves oceans. It makes the Earth tremble from afar and it is beautiful. That is how I see women. Graceful but ferocious." -A boy who fascinates me

"I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead;
I lift my lids and all is born again.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

The stars go waltzing out in blue and red,
And arbitrary blackness gallops in:
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.

I dreamed that you bewitched me into bed
And sung me moon-struck, kissed me quite insane.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

God topples from the sky, hell's fires fade:
Exit seraphim and Satan's men:
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.

I fancied you'd return the way you said,
But I grow old and I forget your name.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

I should have loved a thunderbird instead;
At least when spring comes they roar back again.
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)"

I've learned about self love
a lot in the past few months
and how to love the way
my thighs jiggle

I've learned about self love
a lot in the past few months
and how to appreciate
my thick eyebrows

I've learned about self love
a lot in the past few months
and to remember that my eyes
twinkle like no other

I've learned about self love
a lot in the past few months
and how to treat my body
like a temple

I've learned about self love
a lot in the past few months
and that everyone's definition of beauty
is different

I've learned about self love
a lot in the past few months
and how to accept
that I'll never fit society's standards
but that it's okay

I've learned that I'm beautiful
and that's the most important part
of all

I really believe in the past few months, I've changed and grown more than I have my entire life. I guess it's not much of surprise with the whole college thing, but I didn't see it coming. I'm not the person I was my freshman year of high school, heck, I'm not even the person I was in August. Change is a weird thing, but despite what we think, life isn't meant to be constant. I've learned a lot about love and even more so, falling out of love. I always thought the quote "if you love someone, let them go" was a cliche, but I promise you it's not once you're actually faced with the decision yourself. After sharing so much of your life with another individual, having to let them go can be an incredibly hard thing... but sometimes in order to prosper and grow, you both have to be apart. It doesn't mean the love was lost or that you still don't actually love them, it just shows that what you two shared was bigger than the two of you and it should be left at that... love that can't be explained, what a beautiful thing, right? I've learned a hell of a lot about friendships and the kind of people you want in your life. My amount of friends isn't abundant, but the quality of my friends is. My friends at home and my friends at school are not one of the same, but I think that's why I enjoy them so much. They bring different things to my life. My friends at school, it's unreal. I've experienced so much with them in the little four months I've known them. I'll never forget that Sunday where our daily lives seemed so little, because She was almost gone. My friends at home really proved that distance doesn't change a thing... home is always where the heart is. Pain I've realized is something we are lucky to experience, because it's real. How lucky are we to experience raw emotion? Emotions that are those of our own. I was always ashamed to feel hurt, to cry, to feel pain, or just feel emotion at all... but now I see that I should have been embracing it a long time ago. Those of us who aren't afraid to show how we feel are the true heroes. We let others know that it is okay, it's a part of life. Maybe we should stop thinking being overly emotional is a bad thing, it's a gift almost. To feel for everything and everyone, not everyone gets to experience that kind of thing and it's beautiful, really. Embrace your feelings because another day here is never guaranteed. I've learned that I'm beautiful, despite what anyone tries to tell me. No, my body isn't what makes me beautiful. My mind is what does. My ability to turn words of nonsense into gentle verses of poetry tells you more than my appearance ever will. I've realized that I think in the flow of poetry and I don't think I'll ever going to be the same again. Is that the joy of being a writer? When a sentence you say sounds like it came out of a novel and you find yourself rhyming, without even giving it a second thought. The last few days of 2014 have felt longer than the entire year itself. The end of 2014 is a blur really, high school isn't something I like to give much of a second thought to... and as for starting my new adventure, college has been something for the books. Memories I'll never forget and people I want to be around when I'm one day married with little people who are half of me. These last few days have felt extremely significant and changed me without even meaning to. I've just realized how precious life is, how **** lucky we are to be standing here... Life is a bunch of little moments that are part of a bigger picture, they all set one another off. Every little thing matters. I've realized my words have the ability to change the world, maybe they already have? But you see, I'm just getting started. I'm just beginning to grow and mature. My journey has far more twists and turns and I don't know where I'll end up, but isn't that the wonder of life?

A wise man I know once told me
a thing or two about death
we can spend a day in this world
or we can spend 85 years here
and somehow live the same life
when it comes down to it
it's not how much time we spend here
it's how we spend it
will you spend your life slaving away
or will you spend your life making sure the ones you love
know how widely you love them
an entire lifetime can be lived over duration of one night
time is all in our heads

It's as if you walked in to my life and suddenly, my soul realized that you are everything it was looking for.