it won't stop.
nothing will slow down
i ask for everything to just hang on, hold on a moment
please can you wait
just for a second

nothing ever does

so i pick
pick pick pick
pick pick pick pick pick pick
constantly
over and over and over over and over and over
and over
when that no longer satisfies the compulsion i bite down
longer, harder
until i taste blood

until it's over

at least, for now.

the blood pools at my fingertips
little red wells of humiliation

the pieces of skin collect at my feet
like a scattering of shame
a signpost of the turmoil i cannot contain

the girls around me look me up and down
whisper words of contempt and disgust

"freak"

torn and bitten, i curl into fists

the teachers stare quietly
unable to pass judgement, but the pity smothers me

"disturbed"

the urges are quiet
sated, satisfied

it's done

at least, for now

.
                         
O         
         o       o
O          
                  O      o        
O    
•fill our beak-
er with un-
told chem-
icals•com-
patible  so-
lvents that
fizz... with
bubbles•m-
ix them in to get
the most homogene-
ous of solutions•introdu-
ce heat in the likes of passion
•never a clean reaction, there will
be residue• never right the first time,
failed attempts will be a few......• but once
distilled from undesirable impurity•........then
handle the mixture with utmost sensitivity........•
you'll get a result that can't be bought with money•
because this love in our hearts is the product of



pure chemistry•

.