For B,
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry I cannot bare to speak to you.
I'm sorry if I hurt you.
But most of all,
I'm sorry you couldn't love me.

And if what you quoted to me was truth,
I miss you too.
And what you thought was correct,
I am trying desperately hard to forget you.
It's just not that easy.

I wonder if you still think of me.
If you still check up on me
As I do you, more often than I'd care to admit.

But darling if you ever read this,
I want you to know
That I did love you.
And despite everything I still do.
I'd give anything to erase these past few months
And go back to how things were
When I could hear your name without wanting to **** myself.

I miss you,
Love,
              L

How am I to take care of you,
Take care of us,
When you live life in such a rush.

I can't fix myself and your addiction,
It just adds on to my affliction.
And I'm the only one who cares.
The only one who stares
Truth in the face.
I'm done putting your desires in place.

Tonight you looked me in the eye,
And told me to accept some lie,
To listen to your sad escape,
And expect me to accept this fate.
I am dying in your sad attempt
To forget your weakness and leave you exempt,
From consequence.
And I'm expected to love you.
Expected to just trudge through
This mess.

I'm so angry I could just explode,
Concern myself with how you erode
And let yourself burst up into flame.
While I stand still alone to blame.
This is why I cannot leave,
Alone and lost, left to believe
This garbage you call love and honesty.

In death I find my truth and peace,
I can't erase this life I lease.
But I'm **** near cause and effect,
This cause your pain, deflect
The rest.
I would but nought to die before
This life you let fly and to soar,
To my defeat and this weak roar.
I'll **** myself to flee the poor
And sick excuse you call a lie,
Into those clouds I wish to fly.

You're selfish.
My anguish.

I'd bring to death those you call trust
And sacrifice this pathetic lust.
In the corner of the bathroom stall,
Fighting this fight against your brick wall.
You told me to accept who you are,
But this young man is far too far
From who I once loved and believed.
I'm done being beaten and deceived.

I would **** for you.
This truth may be the only brew
I'll let you have again.