**** its been years since this thoughts had popped in my head
some of them were good , some were bad, some caused my life to be dead
i cry from tears of joy, sadness, and anger
sometimes i can really put my life at at a risk, at danger
so many dates, and still its a gashly fade
wouldn't be myself if it wasn't for the memories i made
i saw my mom cry for the endless addings of the problems
i saw her giving me her hand when i said i don't know how ill slove them
i saw my nephew being born again and again until i see the signs
im stuck in addiction, and i cant figure out why?
i saw the cop chasing me down to a dead end stop, until i got to the ground
i saw myself lookin at my stupidity luaghting at everything around
i dont see a childhood, and i cant see my future
but i can say what i am know , i need the help, a injection with a cure
i dont sleep and don't eat and only cried about a few times
i still see myself on the corner street asking for nickels and dimes
im sorry mom i love you, i committed the hugest mistake
but this situation isnt just a piece of cake
i see my self walk and talk about gibberish crap
i dont like this stupid cheessy unsexual rap

"Hey! I miss you like crazy! On that night you left I ****** cried myself to sleep and it continued for a couple days. Everyday I wonder... how is he doing and I had a dream about you the other night and you had your afro.. ha! And I asked you "hey how you been?" And you said "I'm doing good I even have a job now." And when a certain someone heard my dream, they told me "yeah I don't know if he's exactly doing that he's using". When I heard that, my heart stopped.. it was unbelievable. I started crying. And I hardly ate breakfast. Diego, I know you probably aren't going to listen to me but you don't have to do that. Like you said "I have many skills and talents". Well use those! Not ****. You can actually do something. You're 18. There's many things out there for you to do. If there's nobody there to talk to you .. call the Phoenix house and ask for me. No matter how far apart we are, I will still be there for you. To be honest I got a bit disappointed when I heard but just remember what you learned here. Who worry and care about you! Use your artistic skills! Don't let no drug take you away from that. Hopefully you call soon... I miss you I love you. And I will always be your sister... don't forget  - laura "
I'm sorry Diego. I had to tell her. She was very concerned and since I knew.. I just had too, it was eating me up. But I miss you. Its okay , you can always find that start again. I believe in you. - ash

I woke up this-morning
feeling like I didn't
belong here.

And it took
every ounce of me
to convince myself
that I should stay...

Getting
out of bed
shouldn't be the
hardest part
of any day.