The most beautiful flower will wither away!
But you my beloved, even in death your smile still lingers in my heart.
And your dazzling eyes still daunt me in my sleep!.

Fall like the night
A secret sorrow, a hidden plight
They well up deep, a heavy sea
A grief that's borne, alone and free

No words are spoken, no sound is made
The heart is heavy, the soul is frayed
The tears fall slow, like autumn rain
A quiet mourning, a silent pain

In the stillness, they're shed and gone
Leaving behind a heart that's strong
For in the silence, a voice is found
A whisper of hope, a heart unbound.

4.02.2025

If wishes were chickens, beggars would eat.
But life is not a bed of roses.
Oh! How I wish it were.

Running towards your own death,
voluntarily.

It’s waking up with an immediate anxiety attack
over having to eat to survive.

Every bite denied is a victory over desire
and a demonstration of
self-control
in the most
out-of-control way.

There beyond
The Hidden Valley,
lies an orphan—
Found and forgotten.
The orphan marionette,
controlled by
many strings of
broken hearts and
woven threads of
stolen dead souls.

Once Found,
now forgotten—
Once held,
now discarded—
Cursed and alone,
unraveled in shadows
of endless, empty
field roads.

To feel
All and intensely
To care
Fully and endlessly

Is it weak?
Or is a strength?

Confusion fogging my mind,
I struggle to accept my empathy
For people
For situations
Not relevant to my own
But relevant enough
To consume me
In second hand grief

I’m drowning
Yet emerging

Can I handle these emotions
And still support those in need?

It’s a question I constantly ponder.
With another outbreak,
It’s a question I need to answer.

when i said “i’m fine”
what i meant was “i’m tired”
not of you, but of trying to be
the version of me you could love

when i said “take care”
what i meant was “please stay”
but goodbye is easier when
it doesn’t sound like begging

when you said “i’m sorry”
what you meant was “it’s over”
i caught the silence between your words
the way it wrapped around my throat

and now, when i say nothing
what i mean is everything
i never knew how to tell you
while you were still listening