the poem below is a poem i had made about 2 years ago and i found it in my e-mail.
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black and blue
i felt bruised
a little red
i think i bled

i had a bag
no, not a classy one
they were heavy
and they made me feel dull

but through that horrid time
i felt alive
more than i have ever been
more than i ever dreamed

i opened my lungs
to inhale the solstice
as i slipped into my summer skin,
full of freckles and bruises
and a sadness that always rises with the new summer sun.
my smile turned upwards
like the now cloudless sky
sunburned feet move with quiet life and I,
I try to fit in
with my new summer skin
thoroughly unconvinced
it will fit until Autumn comes again.

Toxic people fill my mind
it' s all too much to breathe
their noiseless talking fills the air
and pollutes all that i see.
I planted rosemary in my mind
to replenish and release,
weeds came around and choked them out
along with positivity
I am small in my mind,
so much smaller than before
I tried to close my house from them
but they broke down my door.
The world is full of beauty, I think
I read it in a book
But voices whisper I am wrong,
Maybe I have been wrong all along.
Is goodness really all within,
And if so can it be taken?
I don’t want them to take my soul,
My heart is there’s for breaking.

This song hasn’t been worth picking up in 42 days,
and I’m giving in.
I’ve lived in my head all my life,
I had feared all my words had run dry.
But I felt in my mind
That all I tried to repress
Only comes back to me in waves,
And now i’m drowning and depressed.
So i’m opening up
And feeling, emotions are misleading.
I rioted for so long
I forgot my own name
This is a peaceful protest,
Indirect, i confess,
I sincerely miss disinterest.

I wish you'd say something;

I wish you'd say the words I'm dying to hear,

I wish we'd talk like we used to,

But we won't.

The more I try to push it,

All the more that I'll destroy it;

A friendship.

I don't even know if I mean anything at all to you.

I wish I do.

But that's a request near to never.

...we haven't even spoken yet.

Here's to hoping it won't **** me deep inside;

"...hey"
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*"√"

I know we've never talked in person;
Dumb, right?
Though once we open the chatbox
We'll talk like long met acquaintances

I know I've said a lot of spontaneous ****,
You'll patch them up with yours;
The moment you typed those random words
It instantly meant something to me

I told you when I wanted to die.
I told you that would be the last.
Yet you peered through me,
Saved me from something I thought I wanted.

It ought to be awkward;
A way I can't fathom,
Yet you talk like nothing's changed;
Comfort I needed.

We talked boring days and sleepless nights,
We talked shows and music,
We talked about lives,
We talked about us.

"Hey"
"Eyyyyy"
"Thanks for keeping up with my ****"
"It's cool I talk about random **** too"

"Hey"
"What's up?"
"I hope I'm not botheting you"
"Hey, it's okay"

"Hello"
..."hey"
"gotta go"
"wait, I—"
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*Never mind