"Seemed like she was sleepwalking,
and awake, at the same time.
Songs were running out of sound,
poems had no longer any rhyme.
Colorful turned into vapid,
and life has lost all its vitality,
but all of her senses refused
to put up with the reality.
And she tried to open her eyes,
wide enough to see the sun.
Though… no sun ray, and no heat.
“One minute it was here… and now gone.”
. . .
And it’s gone Forever.”
It seemed like yesterday to her
when she run across the field,
exuding joy, smelling the freedom
and the flavor of walnuts peeled.
Everything was new and greeping,
no new day was like another,
wandering those endless paths
hand in hand with her father.
And she had no pains, no fears,
but a dream brighter then the rays
which had lasted twenty years,
ten months and thirty days.
That innocent smile was replaced
by her hollow tears of pain.
Then, she was strongly convinced
she’ll never wear that smile again.
Terrified and confused,
no one to explain her, no one there to blame.
She was still hoping to realize,
that nothing, ever, will be the same.
The pain was wrenching her body
face to the merciless death,
seeing him in front of her
without movement… without breath.
“Wish he’ll come for a short while,
enough to look me in the eye…
just the time to say “I love you”
and a harrowing goodbye.
I was so sure about my destiny,
but I can’t beg anymore to life.
‘Cause in the least expected moment,
it quickly stabbed me with its knife.
There are moments I need advice,
moments I want you to see,
moments I try to convince myself
that you are still here with me.
But I can barely pierce the darkness
to look for the things I seek
and I blame myself for fighting,
even thought I feel so weak.
All the strength you have inspired me,
all the good parts that I’ve learnt,
they were stolen by reality
and seems to me that they have burnt. “
. . .
There are people in our lives
we’d do anything to keep
and their presence leaves us marks,
which to erase, are carved too deep.
She tried hard to keep her calm,
but when retracing that day,
lots of thoughts flooded her mind
and they just couldn’t go away:
“Who would’ve thought one day
I’d feel like I had a hole in my brain stem
like I lost in one **** second,
everything I was, everything I am … ?
. . .
Even though today, …it still seems to me untrue,
I won’t allow my dreams …to be taken away too
‘Cause everything I dream, I undoubtedly owe it to
The most important person, the strongest one I ever knew.”
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