They come and I smile and suddenly I remember I'm breaking the rules so I chase them away and close the door deep think about all the bad things in my life play deppresing music.
What can I say I'm addicted to pain.
Why can't I be when everytime I try and be happy something bad suddenly happens.
How can I be happy when I get low from people I expected the highest from.
Sometimes I just sit stare at a blank space and think back and wishing I could change my past.
But I can't and because of that I'm slowly losing my mind and no one is noticing.

Depressed sitting just thinking of ways to get more sad.
Sitting thinking of ways I can cry.
Sitting thinking of ways to hurt myself cause I hate myself I hate the way I'm.
My heart has been broken soo many times its useless.
I mean really what do you do with a heart you can't feel who do you give it to how do you live with it ?
I guess its they right if they say we all addicted to something and I guess my addiction is pain...

If I can find a guy who will watch "When Harry Met Sally" with me, without complaint, and will be okay with me talking through the entire movie, at 1 AM on a weekday even though we both have to work in the morning with tea, chocolate, and a fuzzy blanket, while I wear ugly sweats and an oversized hoodie with no make up and messed up hair, and somehow, if he can still find me beautiful at that moment, I know I've found the one.

Excuse-me,
Was that offensive to you?
I was just pointing out
Something obvious.

Oh dear,
If it were clear
I am sorry to disappoint
It was so smart I missed your point.

The tapestry was hung perfectly on the wall
Telling a story of kings and queens standing tall
Unicorns and castles, green rolling hills
Everyone happy, not a drop of wine would be spilled
People dancing in ballrooms
White horses carrying Shining Knights
Through streets where crowds cheered
All through the night
A perfect woven fantasy taking over the room
Hanging strong and proud, taking away my gloom
I began to melt into the woven cloth
Maybe here I would find my troth
I wanted to stay in this fantasy
A piece of the tapestry I wanted to be
I look at the majestic work of art
I feel the power pulling at my heart

If I told those
Who knew so little
Of another world
Who knew our tales one thing, it would be

That Thor is real, but he has become something to sell to us
That Jesus is real, but he has become something of a conflict
That wars are real, though to you I'm sure they seem insane.

I don't know you, and you don't know me, humans of the Otherworld
And by the rules of our game that should mean we hate one another.
We live by some standards, but sometimes standards build empires.

I want to tell you,
That some of us don't wield hammers,
But pens.
There are those of us who
Hear about a fight and
Run to break it asunder,
Some of us,
Really are heroes.
I've never met many, but I know they're out there,
Distant humans on a distant planet,
I guess we're both
A little detached from humanity.

My eyes are open
But I cannot see
All the abuse you’ve been doing to me

You say you’re sorry, and I say ok
Even though I know it shouldn’t be this way
What kind of power do you hold over me
That I cannot run, I cannot flee

You tell me you own me
And this I believe
I think you would **** me
If I tried to leave

They tell me there are shelters
For women like me
Somehow you’d find it
I’ll never be free

You tell me you love me
It won’t happen again
Until later that night
This will never end

You buy me flowers
The very next day
What can I do, what can I say
I say a quick thank you and go to my room
Knowing what’s coming
I’m filled with dark gloom

I hear the footsteps coming down the hall
I try to hide, but trip and fall
You come in the room, roaring mad
I can feel that this time is going to be real bad

You come towards me
Fists ready to go
I can’t go through this again
This much I know

I grab the lamp next to the bed
Smash it violently over your head

You fall to the floor
Blood everywhere
I feel calm, not at all scared

I pick up the phone
Call 911
And think to myself
What the hell have I done!