Warmth passed between our bodies,
Your skin was soft and wet,
Let me breath out your name
bury it into your chest,
sweet sensation of touch,
oh how you ****** me,
gentle lover, silent sinner,
I have never craved the taste
of anyone as much as yours

Slow and steady wins the race
so please be patient with my heart,
I'm back to notebooks filled up past
the brim with simple love poems
and an empty bed to preach them to,
She has done and filled me up,
Put light back in my smile and
remembered that blue is my favorite color.
So even with hearts beating fast
playing kickball inside my ribcage,
I will walk slow, remember that
slow and steady will win the race,
So hold my heart, and teach it patience

Reaching across your side,
you lay your head upon my chest
We rode back home in the back of my parent’s car,
The night hid our quiet displays of affection
I still feel the warmth of you body up against my own,
The street lights passed one by one
A kind of metronome to the hum of the engine
My limbs went numb hours ago but i dare not move a muscle
Because the silhouette of your face resting peacefully was
all I needed to feel like myself again.

The clouds grew heavy
Their bellies swollen with rain water
They stared at me as I glared back,
My gaze split the sky like a knife
It poured for days.
    
   *  I was a mess,
     I was soaked,
     I was a sponge.*

I tried to ring out all the excess,
All it did was leave me drowning in a puddle
of the parts of myself I no longer needed,
My air tanks ran dry
My body felt heavy
I was sinking for years.
It was hard for me to watch the ones I loved
lowered 6 feet beneath the soil,
It was even harder to look in the mirror
and see a breathing corpse stare back,
My insides were withered like the winter,
All I craved was the heat,
The south was a distant memory,
Fluttered away so many years ago
on a night with the full of the moon and the big of the sky
The sweet song of the willow in the most humble of tunes,
Oh how I have grown now.
Look how these bones have changed.

eyes closed
brain quiet
breathing slowed
body relaxed
heart full

Here in this redolent rain droplets saturate the ground
I watch the clouds move on, then once more the sun to come
this sparkling desert is strewn with tiny diamond stones
the air hangs in petrichor, thick with chaparral
birds drink from puddles in the broad agave leaves
rainwater trickles with steam in the sun of the singing trees
songs of doves coo cooing in the desert mesquite
spiny lizards stop for rest and warmth upon the rocks
they are ancient with tiny rounded teeth
for eating flashing bugs and beetles
here beneath the spindly ocotillo
beneath the pale flowered saguaro, that blooms
amid this ocean of sandy seas
of cool nights and hot breathed days
the way the desert breathes.

Emotions coming back
Marring up my brain
It happened months ago
But I still feel the pain

There was no physical contact
Nothing at all
No verbal communication
Not even a call

It was just a thought
Or maybe a dream
But to me my love
How real it does seem

Intimate thoughts
To a total stranger
Never knowing
You could be in danger

These feelings
I must keep in side
Many nights
I broke down and cried

I will always love you
To the very end
I'll try to be happy
At least I'll pretend