I wonder if you have any idea of what you’ve done
You think that I think that I have won.
I have not won.
And you, dear, you are not fooling anyone.
I let you in and you became a hurricane,
destroying with no aim,
turning a paled eye to my face,
you’d say your words,
you’d shoot your mace,
And you say I was the winter breeze that shook bare your trees,
killing your vibrant reds of Autumn leaves,
But Autumn leaves are already dying, you see
I didn’t see what you’d make out of me.
You’d create a shadow of a cold candle,
smokey thoughts billowing around my head
ceasing to leave
in the dizzy hours of the morning until i have gone through and picked out the stitches of every word of every conversation id sewn together with you,
finding nothing but two children with no one longing for someone who would not leave.
I cannot believe that I did not see
your slurring, grim toxicity,
I wore a bullet proof vest around everyone i knew
no one saw underneath,
yet for you, I put forth my shattered youth,
to you, I exposed the truth
and put the vest away
and in the beginning we fixed each other,
we wrapped ourselves in blankets of the other’s colors
but by the end, the blanket’s colors began to bleed with our own
You distracted me from the
dead hiding in the (hellish) words you put in my head
by the illusion of warmth
In your fiery shades of orange,
I did not notice my shades of blues,
you would melt me,
or I would extinguish you.