I feel the essence of you, and I ache inside,
As you infiltrate my being to the very core,
There is no place for me, unwilling to hide,
Forgive me; I’m unable, to suffer anymore.
Our palpable charisma echoes, who we are,
Shaping us incrementally, acquiring a hold,
We cannot turn back, we’ve come too far,
Our friendship has allowed, love to unfold.
Stranded at crossroads, unable to proceed,
Am I just a dreamer, and you just a dream?
Accepting choices, until I started to bleed,
Fond memories weep, drifting downstream.
So what now, precious love, what do I do?
I’m alone, oh but I feel, the essence of you.

©Paul M Chafer 2016

Poetry lives, sleeps, deep, deep within,
The words, waiting, waiting, waiting,
Nurtured, soothed, lovingly cajoled,
Given form and purpose, till they rise,
Coming to life, unbidden, bursting free.

They echo around the globe, touching,
Slipping silkily into hearts and minds,
Subtly connecting with new-born ideas,
Mingling, coalescing, waiting, waiting,
That’s where poetry come from, (yes),
Poetry lives, sleeps, deep, deep within.

©Paul M Chafer 2016

Your scent-still on my skin
alcohol mixed with cheap cigarettes.
I have tried to wash it off
but have always failed.
I now wear you like perfume
leaving trails for thirsty men.
They follow me like hungry wolves-
hunting to feed on my flesh.
But I will only cut my skin open
when it's your teeth on my body.
You can consume me on broad daylight
Leave me when you're full
and I'm empty.

Hey,
you're never going to break
       this system.
How can you love
      someone when you can't even
   love yourself?
When you stay up late
       so nobody would see
how you cut your skin
     open until your blood
           comes, flowing nonstop
And you waste so much toothpaste
   because purging and brushing
your teeth works best for you
    Now you can't even give  
      a great *******
without wanting to throw-up.

No one will be brave enough
to take a risk with you
       because you can't even
love yourself.

You're just waiting
    and wanting to fade away
soon.

So you try to numb the pain
    when it intensifies
but most of the time.

You feel nothing.  

but baby, that's okay.
          You're so good at pretending

they're never going to figure out
   how much you want to
slit your throat
      from point A
  down to your navel

There are clouds covering my soul
and I know the rain they're crying
is hurting your heart too.
I'd make it nice and shiny
just so you can feel the warmth,
but I don't know how to do it anymore.
Clouds of silence darkening me whole
unspoken words I have for you
are dying under the tempest
while the blank page stares at me
and I feel useless.

A rain of fire
burning us both.

The sun always shines after a storm
and I hope
a rainbow will appear
before these falling flames
will turn us to ashes
flying over the ocean between.

7am again, but in my room it's still night
light won't come inside
though the sun already shines
in the highest skies
in the highest skies.

Cold again, laying in my bed
I miss your warmth
I miss your hand
I call you and in the quiet air,
I feel your absence in my veins
killing me again
killing me again.

I need you to teach me
how to see the light
shining upon the sea
I need you to tell me
how am I supposed to breathe
when you're not here.

I look around to find your shadow
in every corner of my world
I see only emptiness
a desert for my inner flowers.
Oh, tell me,
where have you gone
where have you gone?

Alone I'm wandering again
these streets of despair
dead people walking around me
and I know, oh, I know
without your air
I'll soon be one of them.

*I need you to teach me
how to see the light
shining upon the sea
I need you to tell me
how am I supposed to breathe
when you're not here