I am finding it hard to deal with your loss.

It bleeds again
this heart
the only one capable
to repair it
is you
and you are never here.

I don't get it, I don't get it, I don't get it.
I don't get you.
I don't get you, I don't get you, I don't get you.
Will writing this ease it?
I think not.
How else am I to wrap this
if not in words. they hide, they hide, they hide
they give
but I don't get this
not now, no more
no more.

I write things
that hardly make sense.
But one day I will write things
that do make sense.

Now you appreciate poetry,
then, you will understand pain.

I don't know what to do
with myself anymore
that you are no longer here
and we are no more together.

I wish
it was for me.
What you wrote.

I think, sometimes,
I will die taking that wish
of mine with me.
I cannot be your poem
ever
it seems.

And I don't know what to write, anymore.

will be the death of me

Don't look back.
There's just fire there.
Protect your heart from that warmth because you cannot just melt away into nothing now.
Not again.

Two months and a week,
and you said you cared.

I don't know what kind of a revenge that is.
You left me, so I left you.
But it's just me who is suffering.

Nothing worse
than words unsaid
and ink pens left to dry.

twist in the stomach
heaviness on my chest
this is how I take it out.

Nobody is gone. Nobody is unhappy. Nobody cries at night. Nobody is scared of little things. Nobody is losing. Nobody is fighting. Nobody thinks about ending life.

Nobody hates anyone. Nobody envies. Nobody turns a blind eye. Nobody is indifferent. Nobody is cruel.

Nobody is sick. Nobody feels weak. Nobody is giving up, ever.

It gets okay, right? At the end. It does get better if you survive, yes?

Only you matter, sweetheart

Everything and everyone
else
are merely details
in a world I don't care about.

I am trying to leave you.
I think I will miss you for a long time.

i can't.

How's your dad?*
I feel like asking you
But I know why I shouldn't
talk.

You had told me that you
loved me. Now you don't want to
talk to me. That's okay, I guess,
because I know I am the reason.

But I really want to ask you
how your dad is, if you're coping well
with his disease, if you're fine.
If you think of me at all...

And all of a sudden I don't want to talk to him anymore.
It frightens me because  I am too little and I am sinking
and
the sea is so deep.

I am so overwhelmed
that I don't know what to say
though surely
a poetry like that
deserves a response.

Maybe I'm afraid
because I know this can't last
long
unless 'the' mountain moves.

It's different for me than it is for you.

I hope
you get
and I get
what is better.
And if it's each other
then may so be.

I miss you.
I miss you, I miss you, I miss you.

I
miss you.



I   miss   you.

*****.

You're really sad basically

That maybe one day you'll return
And the universe will make up
For all that we have lost.

You are mad.
Simply mad to be so obsessed.

I am dying hi

I missed you
so much
but it wasn't enough
It wasn't enough to bring you back
To help me heal
To let me forget.

It wasn't enough but I missed you
A little too much.

because my heart bleeds such.

and I won't be here.
Not any more.