I want to love violently,
Ripping everything to shreds with the power it gives me.
I want to love gently,
Dragging my fingers slowly across your cheek where the sun kisses it good morning.
I want to love adventurously,
With our hair whipping in the wind on the way to a city far away, driving music blaring.
I want to love intentionally,
By grabbing your hand and ditching a party to kiss in the dark because you're the only one I want to be with.
I want to love with overflowing passion,
Running to catch the bus and then our breaths after coffee took too long.
I want to love without thinking,
Dialing your number automatically for the slightest of things.
I want all these things for my love, but most of all
I want to love you,
Forever.

Rage licked her insides
Until it burst from her
In an almighty inferno,
Tearing apart everything
Unclean in her vicinity.
She demanded that her life be worth something,
And it was.

Go out and search for yourself.
Find small pieces of you in the veins of a friend
Or inside the forest.
Find your soul sprinkled in some foreign city
Miles away from home
Or in your backyard
Mingling among the flowers.
Search for the bakeries
That call your name from within
Or the stranger that smiles at you as you pass.
Search yourself out;
There, you will find, is the purest reflection of you.

I say I'm okay
but I'm not
I'll have my good days
and I'll have my worst
but until the day
I go to bed without
a feeling of dread
or tears on the bed
pounding in my head
the inability to catch my breath
I'm not okay

I won't truly be okay
Until the day
I can say hello
without having to rehearse it
or wonder if I said it
too quiet
or too loud
if it even came out
and worrying if
the conversation will go past that

If the most I say
about how I'm feeling
is okay
and you had to ask in the first place
I'm probably not

If I'm more worried
if you're okay
than I'm probably not
because until I unlearn
how to pick everybody but myself up
I'm not

I say I'm okay
so you don't have to worry about me
but I'll still cling to all the care
and love you give to me
because I'm still unsure
if its all I get
so until the day
I don't feel the need
for reassurance that you care for me
I'm not okay

Until the day
I can no longer relate to this
I'm not okay
but I'm working on it

I will wait for the one who feels like baking sugar cookies
For the one that smells like climbing trees
For the one that looks like a morning after sleeping in a hotel
For the one that sounds like smiling before a roller coaster takes off
For the one that tastes like swimming way after the sun has gone down
I will wait.

With one look
You set my soul on fire
Lit it up like the Fourth of July

With one glance
My heart engulfed in flames
And my breath labored

An illness I never want to build immunity to