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I thought I'd take a walk today,
down the road,
around the block.
Detach myself,
go where I feel,
not where I think.

I found myself under dimly lit street lamps,
questioning the lamps ferocity.
Man strives for evolution,
and around me it stands,
a testament to our ferocity,
our everlasting battle to be better.
Yet it feels so limp,
a dim light like a wisp of wind.
Not a raging fire,
a lions roar.

How great are we really?
Are the edifice of our time a testament to our eminence?

I stare into the window of a home.
On the television,
damnation.
A preacher and a parishioner,
absorbing the rhetoric.

One might think nothing of it,
but everything has a motive.

As I round the bend,
I think to myself an old idiom,
"the spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak".
Our evolution is stalled under the impression that these edifice represent progress.
Alas, our minds remain stale.
Thousands of years of blood,
greed and deceit,
rest under dimly lit street lamps,
unseen and ignored.
Copyright Barry Andrew Pietrantonio
I met a friend today
His name was Death
He smiled big with pure white teeth
And minty fresh breath
I asked him what he did for a living
Staring blankly at me, batting his eyelashes
He did the opposite of giving
What did that mean?
But the closer I got to Death
The better I understood his scheme
In his sharp black suit he won me over
I felt an irresistible draw
Like to a diamond in the rough, or a four leaf clover
He convinced me of the beauty in the night
That when the moon was hidden from view
There was nothing better than the lack of light
He led me from my lust for life
Sang to me in my sleep
Whispered sweet nothings and handed me the knife
I tried to pull away from my newly found friend
But his choke hold was so tight
On him I started to depend
The world could see me deteriorate into nothing
He held me harder and closer
With shortness of breath I stood huffing and puffing
Enclosed in the lackluster of our friendship I became numb
The emotions drifted with my vitality
I tried to retrieve them but could only attain 1/5th of my former sum
The more time you spend with a person
The more you become like them
I suppose I couldn't see the situation worsen
Collar around my neck he leashed me like a dog
I cared so deeply for him
My haze filled mind ignored the dense fog
I came to terms with my life long trap
Death circled like a satellite around my position
No matter where I went he found my place on the map
Eventually I succame to this fate
Despite his control
Death, I could not hate
I loved him too dearly to notice the signs
I couldn't think clearly
His presence was odious and it wasn't benign
 May 2018 Lillian May
Barker
Clay
 May 2018 Lillian May
Barker
People are like clay.
We can mold to adapt.
We can change how we look,
But not what we are made of;
And if we are left uncared for
We become as hard as rocks,
And that's the tragedy of living.
(c)ibarker
 May 2018 Lillian May
Alex
x
 May 2018 Lillian May
Alex
x
I find myself frequently spacing out. Again.

A year of only feeling almosts of a state I thought my mind got over with.

I thought we were done with this, Alex.

Graduating set off a switch that lit up my mind and drowned it in anxiety. Again.


The bile is crawling up my throat and all I see is myself, when I was thirteen, asking how the hell did we even get here?
Love is too amazing
      For anyone
  To be sorta loved

        If you’re
Going to reach for
The heart , I would
Hope  that you use
       Both hands
               For
The heart is never a thing
      To be taken lightly

          Don’t try
Grabbing it with one hand
           While
       Holding on
 To someone else’s
          Heart

Never to embrace
          The new
 While holding on To
          The old

       Remember
                      
   Love isn’t love
           Until
   It moves beyond
           Words
  Action is everything
  
  If you truly want
           To be
  In someone’s
          Life
You will create the best
       Possible
Way to get  there

            For
 We all  deserve a
Consistent kind
            Of
          Love
 May 2018 Lillian May
lara
it all feels like disease and i want to strip my bones raw; manic
(sugar rush deity)

what am i to you… what are you to me, aside from endearing silhouettes; pixie
(mumbling shy songs)

in an ocean of violents in bloom we speak artificial prayer; dream
(cloaked in starry-eyed acapella—thats what they think, no?)

i surrender to your clarity and intensity and charm and beauty that my hands are too numb and dull to touch; girl

and then comes wrath: a dewy vileness teetering on the brink of your 9th life
now hell has harnessed my chest, for it is with deep regret and shaky sobs that every opening and crack in my body emits rotten remains of our silent war…

but there are still heartfelts i never mustered up the courage to let go of:

thank you for tip-toeing around broken strings to reach out once more, twice more
thank you for enduring my futile voyages through resentment
thank you for soaking all my insanity in like sunlight and excreting back out a gentle rainfall
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