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An urge to escape, fastened with a belt
Senses of conflict, preparing to melt
Imagine a life concealed as a boy
Thought upon others dancing with joy
Feelings of envy?, questions?, and hopes?
The life of a female ******* in ropes
Cut me some slack, to emerge from this shell
With the strength to stand up, whenever I fell
Forget what they said, they're stuck on rewind
Attempt to look forward, and leave them behind
Letting the sand seep through the glass
Each grain of sand, a day in the past
Setting the scene in dark shades of grey
My very own painting intended this way
Although I did say, that's what I intend
Fine traces of colour mix into the blend
They bleed and descend, like inside a dream
No need to pretend, if you know what I mean?
Unlocking a shutter, to view the next stage
That's just the book cover, before the next page
Was I on the verge of a long waiting game?
As all of the pages were numbered the same
A feeling of doubtfulness hit at close range
And half the way through, I noticed a change
But as I look back, in outbursts of laughter
My worries had vanished into the next chapter
This story I told, is split into two
And it starts with the old, revealing the new
A lesson that change is both patience and time
As every grey cloud has a fine silver line
My last stroke of paint, lets give it a chance?
And it's signed at the bottom
By Claire Torrance
 May 2018 Kristina Carmela
Meghan
woe
What was it like to view the past?

It's hearing every notes in the piano.

High and low.

We did love each other

Even time is speeding but my heart forgets slow

I really love you, just so you know
i hurt myself tonight.
a thin red line on fair white canvas,
painting my emotions into my skin.
and i don’t know any other reaction
to the tempests in my thoughts
than to shut out the pain
with another perpetrator.
i hurt myself tonight.
but for now, it’s the only pain
i feel.
i can no longer sleep, for the image of your face intrudes the drowsy blackness under my eyelids that calls me. and your words are louder than the choruses of the tired.
 May 2018 Kristina Carmela
Triste
A book says,
"Read to get away."
A pen says,
"Write to be reminded."
The mind says,
"I live to reminisce."
And the heart says,
"I am always at stake."
To the one who made her broken, undefined
Can I take care of the rubble you left behind?
Can I collect her pieces, help rebuild her whole
Can I have her heart, the one you previously stole
 May 2018 Kristina Carmela
Cné

Poetry comes back to me
where long there had been none.
Lyrical, the imagery, once shared
and then was done.

Thoughts of such sincerity
in words that grace the page,
Race across the span of time
that bridge the gap of age.

Trusting in the ardor that
has cooled and healed with time,
I read again the tender lines
of kindred souls, in rhyme.

Oh spirit of another age,
reach out from time and space.
Fan the embers turned to ash
and torpid ruin replace.

My God I am blind for I look, but do not see
Change my heart Oh God won’t you change me?
I trust in your goodness in your most sacred heart
I pray Lord for wisdom and not simply smarts
I pray for your peace and strength in my day
I pray for the light to guide my steps along the way
I pray for your protection against my foes seen and unseen
I pray for a greater understanding of what my life means
I pray for direction and I ask for your blessing
I pray for peace and for less stressing
I love you Lord for your ways and right and just
Lord I trust you, help me ever more to trust
For the storms of life may rage for a time
But even in the storms you tell me “You are mine”
The sun will shine again and in the sky a rainbow fills
Showing us you love us now and you always will
So in your arms I’ll safely rest
For God is Father and Father knows best
If you are a suicide survivor
Inbox me your name
And I’ll add it to my tattoos of others

You guys mean the world to me
And I have my own name on my arm
Because I too, am a suicide survivor.
Inbox me your name. Make this go viral so I get names. Hopefully it inspires someone to fight a little harder. Anyone wanna join me?

If you understand I’m sorry. Stay strong friend.
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