I went to Space in a space shuttle,
I saw stars on my way
But little did I know,
it would drop me off in a forest.
It was beautiful and green,
It was alive and full of smiles,
The trees were huge but friendly,
Birds singing, animals all around me,
Unknown creatures were peeking behind the huge trees as if they were shy to greet me, fairies blowing me kisses. I must’ve felt those kisses because I could feel and see spots of my skin moving.
But when I woke up, I wanted it to be over.
I hated the after results,
I was tired and hungry,
I couldn’t breathe, my heart was pounding.
I was busy slapping bugs off of me.
I wanted to pull my hair out,
I wanted to bang my head against the wall,
Rocking back and forth in full panic mode.
I was scared and felt alone,
I needed someone sober to hold my hand or just hold me but I had no one.
I cried all night long for someone.
When I look into your eyes I see paradise,
A gorgeous sunset over the blue ocean.
When I see your smile it makes my heart dance in that ocean.
You take me to a place of happiness,
A place that I feel cared for and loved.
You take me there, a place that I thought was impossible to take someone to. You make me feel my best when nobody else does or ever did, I call this dancing in the ocean.
Not an open book when it comes to honesty and feelings,
Judgement and rejection are my fears,
Although, I’d rather be rejected than to be judged.
Nothing more I want than to come clean, break the chains that I keep over my shattered heart, just let everything out.
But unfortunately, it’s not that easy.
People that can be your future will always pay the price for people in the past and that’s not fair.
You were the first man to leave,
Sometimes I feel anger and confusion,
Knowing you had far more important things to do than to stay for the birth of your daughter.
You came around again, spent time with me, but you acted like I was a burden so you left again. You have a habit of leaving and this 9 year old little girl didn’t know why, all she wanted was her Daddy, someone that’s supposed to protect and love her.
Yeah, you had your issues and another mans family is paying the price for that, but now you’re paying the price for it all.
You’ve become a better man, keeping in touch, but often I ask myself if you’re just bored or lonely or when you get out, are you going to run back to your old ways or are you running back to your daughter, only you know that, but I’ll always love you.
A mark that an author uses to end their story but chooses not to,
A reference for someone who wants to end their life but chooses not to,
A person who reminds the someone to just keep going.
If you have no other reason to stay on earth let me give you a reason,
Don’t end your story, write it and keep writing it. Write what you would want to read,
Write what you would want your parents, children, and siblings to read.
There is something or someone being your semicolon because you’re still here, so stay and keep writing your story.
Be someone’s reason to live. Remind them their life on earth matters and to keep going. Reminders are free and lives are priceless. 💙
A swan gliding on water,
A bird soaring through the sky,
A horse running magnificently,
A tiny dancer who wants to fly.
Bold and strong on her own two feet,
Beautiful and driven with every step,
Vulnerable and powerful through her spirit as she freely lets go,
Awaken and alive in the moment.
Dancing away all of her demons,
She is who she is when her feet moves,
Just a girl dancing with her soul.
The idea I had in my head,
The idea that we were meant to be or at least I thought, the idea that I seen you in my future but you seen someone else in yours.
You married her and now you have a family. Often I can’t help but to feel that should’ve been me but I sit here feeling sorry for myself wondering when will I get my happy ending, the happy ending of healing and moving on.