I want you to beg for me to take you back so I can be
as cruel as you were to me
and say in dulcet tones
A whisper:
"No."

I want to touch lava but I can't

my head is a lava lamp

(I) seaweed skin
today there is a
crevice where my
lungs used to be

(II) brass arteries
i took the long
way to work this
morning trying
to sidetrack my
mind with new
roads but there
are some bits of
you creeping up
my spine and
burrowing into
my hair and
nuzzling my ear
i had thought that
by now i would be
able to take breaths
without chunks of
sentences meant for
you breaking off
from my bronchial
tubes but they are
somehow still lodged
in there like they
have been called home

(III) umbrella heart
i used to wish no one
would ever touch me
ever touch me ever
touch me because their
fingerprints would last
too long and i can't scrub
them off like i want to
please let this be different
please let this be the end
of you aching at the base
of my skull and robbing
me of my purple dreams
and green hopes i want
to feel myself in my arms
instead of you

The excess raindrops
get louder
with every open window
like you become
more tantalizing
with every cheap tile
you cross over
with your ashamed
feet
in those miserable
hallways
And you know as well
as I do
that it is not easy
having a sentimental,
earthly element
remind you of
where you wanted
your last breath
to be raked from
the blood and
the gray
that would have
been soaked into
soil
before anyone noticed.

Stand here or just shrug away
Leave me that heart you say you've held
Forcing me to ponder hopelessly
In the deepest depths and realms
That scent-
That smile-
That eerie grin-
Still lingers in my mind
Like piercing needles puncturing
The chambers of my mind
Stop
Go
Just wait in time
Like the ones around you will
Losing moments
Precious moments
The ones that make you ill
Deep inside of this twisted mind
I call my memory
I lock it up and keep it tight
Your secrets safe with me

                                        Alysia Marie 2015 ©