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 Feb 2015 Jonathan Howard
adlne
You left,
And I felt a shift.
The "shift" turned out to be
My heart rearranging itself
To live without you.
You'll find me in the forest
Beneath the silver birch tree
With ribs in weaves of primrose
And stomach in knots of heather
 Feb 2015 Jonathan Howard
JM
Water born lovers-
Ripples became tsunamis,
Floodplains bring new life.
Silt and fertile soil
Flowers blossom with love's rain
Sol consumes the fog
 Feb 2015 Jonathan Howard
Deenah
I'm floating in this vast bed
Of deep blue sea
And yet I can't swim.

I'm hanging from the this tall canopy
Of green and golden leaves
And yet I can't fly.

I'm buried in this narrow hole
Of dark brown soil
And yet I can't move.

I'm soaring in this open plain
Of weightless white air
And yet I don't know where I'm going.
It's all too much.
The will to live
is a gift none
can give.
Your name has become
an alliteration in my mind
Your face a sunset
that waits for my dream to catch up
I’m sorry it's taking so long

I know why you are so vague
when once you were so obvious
I broke your mind enough not to care
but justice was served upon mine
I’m sorry it had to happen that way

We were headed for the sun
without fear of getting too close
But that is exactly what happened
and we knew then the game was real
I’m sorry I found out too late
A rock glancing across a pond
thrown before we knew who
would care to set our life in motion

How long before the last leap forward?

When and how
The only questions that remain
When… and how

The questions, never asked within
the pleasure of my own flesh, even
as it aged slowly by the currents
that guided the rock, became nearer
as clear waters revealed where I
might come to rest

But now, when fear of loss looms
along with what I can feel but
cannot control, the question of
when becomes that of how
for what accompanies my fears
now is the pain inside those
who would love me for the
mere fact of my existence
and my love for them

When all momentum begins to cease what
will you feel with the end rising all around
you; what once propelled you forward
now draws you near to the questions
you once ignored but now must confront

When and how; now you know

But the question has now become who

Who have you become?

Is it the stone hurled by someone
else or the stone sinking because
life became something you could
not prepare for or know?

Who will you be when the world
doesn’t value a stone seeking
the floor where all sound must
cease and the sun and the rain
can only be seen through the
prism of fate and destiny colliding
all around you while you wonder
if the choice ever mattered

But what you brought with you
are the secrets of a life with one
more chance to help another stone
hurtle further; held aloft by your
wisdom even though it may never
know that what sunk to the bottom
was not to be forgotten but instead
God’s hand if you will only believe
in your purpose
february and the roses have
finally stopped flowering

above stormy clouds
the moon scatters like a ghost

i dream of you, of you...

and the night glides peacefully
to rest while i sigh and wait.
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