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there’s a boy I love,
the boy doesn’t speak,
the boy is pale, a body full of bones.

his ****, limp
his eyes, weeping
his form, skeletal and twined.

i want to dissolve him into body wash,
clean my body with his.

there’s a boy,
a touch of 25 to his grace.
the boy kisses like he’s carving gold into cement.

he makes art out of willowing branches of thighs,
out of dove-necked wrists,
out of a sloped, vining neck.

there’s a boy,
mute; but as loud as roaring packs of waves.

there’s a boy i love,

even when i swore love was what I was most afraid of.
As I'm sitting in the back
memories of the past haunt me
I close my eyes against the pain
trying to block out the noise

The thoughts reverberte in silence
as I fight to hold back the tears
I'm just the girl sitting in the back
so nobody actually cares

I watch the world around me
content to just observe
I see the horrible reality
The truth begins to unfold

The way humans interact
is truly disgusting indeed
because they rely on looks and beauty
instead of what you need

I watch this all unfold
in the back of class
I wipe the tears from my face
silently, beginning to laugh

I may be insane
but I don't really care
I'm broken beyond repair
So nothing really matters

I'm just the girl in the back of the class
as everyone's laugh echoes
I sit in silence, Watching
listening, to the voices
The skies are my companions,
our lungs are perfectly still
under the weeping clouds,
we don't breathe.
We are rancor-soaked
tattered eyes
(they seem old because
we lost the innocence
of our childhood in the scream of thunder).
Our future is a mirage,
I'm too dim to be defined as a star,
you cannot be a meteor
because your fire isn't potent.
But we are nothing short of brave,
we have our memories bound in scars
that can't possibly heal.
We bleed without being cut,
I will simmer down but
I am not a calm soul,
I blaze too loud sometimes,
I will scream until my lungs cave in.
I will run until my legs crumble.
I will search for the cloud
stable enough to carry my depth.
I will learn to stumble
across your terrain
under this relentless rain.
I will try to tell the sky that he is not alone.
It's my birthday! Turned 17 today ^.^
The worst thing I ever did to myself was love you.
I loved you at my worst
and when you broke my heart,
I slipped even further than I ever thought I could
self-destruction in the form of loving you
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