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 Dec 2015 Johanna Magdalena
M
I often ponder whether I'd rather have had you pretend to love me
Until the end of my short life
Or if I should be thankful
That I will not die believing your lies
To love and be loved,  is equal to holding the keys to Heaven on Earth


Everyday I write pages and pages of

LOVE letters, poems, quotes for you

I pour out my heart to you

I start my day by seeing your photo

Wishing you good morning

Talking with you,

Scolding you for not being with me

Asking you to be with me

I lose you with every thought

That's why such longing for you

I play your song list again and again

So much that my family calls me insane
I'm sorry
That I am who I am

I'm sorry
I can't control my world

I'm sorry
If I did something wrong

I'm sorry
If I did something right

I'm sorry
If I didn't do anything at all.

I'm sorry
For the hate

I'm sorry
For the love

For all the pain inside you
And inside me.

And mostly I'm sorry
That I don't know how to get rid of it.
I say "I'm sorry" at least 50 times a day. Trying to delve into why I do this or why I think I need to apologize.
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