You're a one night stand
But we spent too many nights
I lost count of it.

You're that unexpected kiss
On a drunken wasted night
Of vomits and *****.

You're that awkward hi
Exchanged by strangers who
Thought they both knew each other
But were clearly mistaken for another.

You're the bruise that turns blue
When I accidentally bump my leg
On the corner of the bed.

You're the scar that I never
Knew I had.

You're the bittersweet taste in
My mouth every morning.

You're the last thought lingering
In my head before slumber takes me
And you're the vagueness that
Haunts me in my dreams.

You're the scalding hot shower
In a cold freezing morning.

You're the boiling tea that numbs
My tongue for the rest of the day.

You're the obsession
I will never learn to let go of.

You're that person I will
Never get to call mine.

You're the one that got away.

If life is the poison
**** is the antidote
I feel it flowing through my body
Cut it open like a cannibal
Gut it with my finger
Grind the pound of flesh
Sew it back up
Take it to the head

She was the train you missed by a second
You look longingly at her direction long after she was gone

She was the coffee that spilt before you could take a sip
The scent of her and the stain on the carpet remains to remind you of what you lost

She was the flower you planted that withered before it bloomed
You are always left wondering how beautiful your life would have been with her around

She was the card you didn't call when you had a strong hunch that you could have won
She was the chance you didn't take

If you had only rushed to meet her...
If you had only handled her right...
If you had only given her more attention...
If you had only been more brave...

it’s cold and you’re warm and the sun is
almost about to rise and you are
going to tell me you love me and i
am
sick to my stomach
because you’re filling voids i didn’t know i had and
it’s scaring me
it’s scaring me to be whole and it’s
scaring me to feel
it’s scaring me that you are growing this close
and i cannot even believe i’m letting you
and i am worried you are going to say i love you
and i am worried i am going to say it back

*k.c.