I can feel your whip
when I pull you like a mule
I beg you to strike harder
because I can hardly feel

I am a dead horse
I'll show you my naked bones
admire their beauty
and watch my body rot

I stood in the water
tried to wash away my sins
tried to brush it off with steel
but my sentence is incomplete

You made me pull harder
and I fall deeper in the soil
mud beneath your fingers
is not like mud in my blood

You put out the fire
just to keep me in the dark
but I've been already blinded
and your whip strikes with brutal force

I try to speak up
but my lungs are full of stones
and lies you have seeded
make me pull once more

This is my last confession
I loved you and I don't
last whisper to the wind
may it carry ashes of joy

She's dying alone
in a hospital bed
she has five children
but she's all by herself

Her husband is dead
she's on minimal wage
her kids pay a caretaker
so they don't have to care

Screams of other patients
and persilen smell
nurse pushing meat wagon
that is her bed

Disembodied
screaming in pain
she once was a human
but now she is dead

I found love where it wasn’t supposed to be,
In the absinthe eyes of a perfect stranger.
Beautiful people in beautiful cities;
Where do I fit in?
I want to fix his coffee each morning,
Fix his tea each night.
I want to bake him pastries that he will crave when I’m not around,
Because the bakery down the street isn’t me.
I want to be the one to caress his back,
Run my fingers through his hair
When he wakes up afraid in the middle of the night.
I’ll give anything to be his safe haven.
The things we do for love, eh?
If only he would look at me
As I pass him on the crowded sidewalk.

I can hear the endless sounds
of my soul bleeding
and down the drain it goes
and all that was right
is now wrong
until it disappears completely
that's what it is
living alone
in a nether
with no family
with the world chewing you
ever so slowly
and pushing you back
in a trashcan "not normal"
or box for "socially acceptable"
and so called friends
lurking in shadows
waiting for you to fall
so they can salvage what is left
and you are alone
alone and your legs broken
that will teach you not to stand
alone and you will never be "home"
with bleeding soul
and heart so cold
that it gives you shivers
out of touch
and out of control
lets write him off as "lost"

When you feel empty it gets harder to write
Or to find motivation in the broad light
You just sit there breathing in air
Rocking back and forth in my hammock thinking about pleasure and dispare
Papers are due but I don't seem to panic
Knowing if I don't do them my grades will sink like the Titanic
I want my feelings to come back because I feel empty inside
At least there's no pain withering in side
For once this emptiness has put up a stride by demolishing the thoughts of suicide that were slowly trying to take over inside