I held my breath the first time I moved.
I cried while my cat screamed,
feeding off of my tension and the yelling
of the woman behind the wheel.

Like an automated sprinkler, my eyes
only watered when she was around.
As soon as I was alone, as soon as I was out,
The tears subsided.

Yet one can only hold so much in,
one can only endure so much before
the glass starts to crack and wires fray,
before the frayed wires spark the fire sprinklers
And the alarms blare.

I got in the truck with a smile on my face.
My head swayed to the songs that normally
made me cringe, the cat had no negativity
to feed off of.

Three hours went by quicker than the fourty five minutes
I first took. My muscles ached from carrying boxes,
but the stress evaporated with every step.
I was home and happy.

The wishes I made upon those shooting stars,
the wishes with tear stained eyes and a blood stained heart,
were answered and accommodated all along.
I just had to come **back home.

I went to the beach to get away.
My tears followed, though stunted
by the windchill.

I gazed out at the fleeting waves,
and wanted to walk behind them
until we were one.

The stars warned me to sit,
to watch safely from the shore.
I sadly obliged.

A few burst of light captured
my weary eyes in the sky.
Shooting stars.

I closed my eyes with a wish,
over and over again until my tears
matched the stars.

I only want one thing in this life.
If I cannot have it, the stars will acknowledge
my detour through death.

Not Particularly living up to his name,
Fear stands with open arms,
Welcoming me with a smile.

He is Handsome.
Standing tall with no suspicious qualities;
Beautiful eyes carry no emotion,
Crimson orbs, fiery yet tranquil.

He is Kind.
Like the boyfriend you've always wanted,
He will embrace you with warmth,
Completely faithful in your name.

He is perfect.
And yet, he is what flaws mankind.
Stalking your mind, making you wish
you could walk away from his embrace.

He is persistent.
Making you hesitate with decisions,
Closing your mouth before you can speak,
Making your eyes surge with eerie anticipation.

He is aggressive.
Knocking you over with ominous thoughts,
Choking you, restraining your voice.
Shackling you, turning you powerless.

He isn't real.
Conjured up by outside voices,
By your own nature, and though you know that,
he is more real than any person.

He is Fear.
And he will consume you.

Your music died so suddenly.
The sweet keys lingering, healing my ears
have sang their last goodbyes, the bleeding
it's own crescendo until I am swept away
by the silence.

Your art was once delicacy.
Filling my eyes with sweet blending colors,
then tainting sight as you brushed your last
stroke, a wave of black upon a now perpetual
colorless sea.

A poets play forever gone.
A story filling a heart's glass full
now ******* every last drop of life out of my system,
A rose once so sweet now my downfall as your voice, your face, your love
Forever dies.

I promised you no pain I'd cause,
Yet tears looked so attractive
on your face.

I swore your love was all I need.
You trusted me with your heart,
your mistake.

Your dresses tattered like your soul,
Being battered by surprise
in my eyes.

How sweet that you once loved me, child.
But betrayal, my true name,
Is sweeter.

No one could hear that sound.
The eerie sound of nothing, of no one
for all was a sea of laughter, with waves of glee.
Golden smiles like the sun shining down with no
sign of tears rolling in or screams from above;
That was painted in our minds.

Your eyes saw this and much more.
Hearing the same waves crashing and birds singing,
The same smell of pure hearts like salt in the air
lingering, distorting the truth that was all too known.
You could read the pages of each bird's fate clearly
without their eyes glances to aid.

Your face was just a ghost in gold.
A fake smile shining, shielding the fact that
These birds would soon drown, the water burning
them in their glee and revealing their true hatred.
Your fate was a matching pair, you could hear the sound
of nothing, fate's voice.

You enjoy the lies amongst the people
that all will be well once this party dies, fades
and laugh you remaining minutes away.
Your eyes, your topaz stones shine despite the fact
that you know what the calls of birds represent.
The Silence Before The Storm.

Bitter.
Like a poisoning scent of wine,
The tickle of heat leaving my skin
as you kiss me with those ripe citrus lips
and pin me against the icy tomb.
This chapel, made of smooth stones
carved by your lies trapping me,
next to you, my true nightmare.
Snaking up my neck, down my back
teeth melting into my perfect skin
My interior paint now like a river
just like these threatening tears.

Lost.
Like a rose plucked from it's soil
you stripped me of everything,
caressing the petals and thorns,
your twisted smile stabbing me
while to you thorns do nothing.
I try to escape to the gardens
only to be dragged back by your
skin burning mine like fire to a field.
The wine lingers as your laugh
paralyzes me, as you poison me.

Destroyed.
Although to eyes I look like me,
hearts and minds see otherwise
as they see the lifeless doll of what
was once a music box forever singing,
dancing around until you forced me shut..
And the bitter taste of fruits and drink,
the sting of your everything on mine
Is to blame.