And I had to walk away
I was just hoping at least he noticed I didn't run

my town
where wild flowers grow
between tram tracks.
there was a time when
it was hardly morning,
no bridge into daylight.

walls had ears,
neighbors had eyes
whispering behind the curtains
there was an emptiness in the guts
of the city
and poetry locked in the drawers,
Borges was read under the blankets
while Dostoievski was  a comforter:
demons were embedded.

yeah, people were clapping and smiling
watching the nub of history, numb
they had a life to live,
what can you say?

one day the radio
burst on in the streets
some were shivering in the attic
"we are free", they said
"we are free",
came the echo in trance

"shhhhh"! said others,
let us wipe the blood
don't disturb the sacrificed
so we can sleep
without dreams

it's Thursday in my town
streets are weary
and our souls are
slowly expanding

I wanted to write a poem about flowers, so that's what I did.
It was short, expressed how I feel, and cut like glass.
I showed my father "Flowers" and he thought it was mediocre.
And I said, "No, "Mediocre" is the poem where I talk about dying,
and I'm trying to stay alive, so I wrote about flowers."

Flowers strangling soil plots with their roots, with their existence.
And to hurt something you love with your existence is a terrible feeling.

Has the darkness seeped into you
And set you alight like a wild fire?

Beneath all the smiles,
Past all the lies.

Does it ravage your soul
As the loneliness burns each part of you ?

Beneath this surface
A storm begins to brew.

*Have you dreamed so much
Only to find that life has lost its flavor?

A shadow grows within me
Whispers drive me mad.

Do you wish for second chances
Even if you know you'd do it wrong again?

As the wind begins to roll in
And the waters begin to flood.

Would you love someone with all your heart
And let yourself believe in it, despite the truth?

You'll find me in the corner,
A girl with a broken soul.

Gravity, Gravity, Gravity pulls me away,
Heading, Heading, Heading towards uncertain ways.
Answers are distance apart, too weary worry.

Leave me be, emotions sickness.
You are my pure weakness.

The hologram memories,
Bleeds haunting entries,
Triggered by many entities.

Sometimes it’s just too much
   with just one touch,
Cravings comes in a rush,
   fragile heart being crush.

Knowing you, I must arise
   in the dawn of sunrise.
I raise my hope to be able to cope,
to stop the lasting loop of this urging dope.


*© Pax

Caroline loves the ocean.  
Her soul sails on a Carolina breeze.
But her music's in the mountains,
and her heart's back home
where it needs to be.

I'm stuck here
in a Carolina wind,
wading in the ocean
with my heart in Tennessee,
and my mind on Caroline.

Carolina's got everything
a man could want.
Everything he needs.
It's got the mountains and the ocean.
It has a Carolina breeze.

He has everything but Caroline;
everything but Tennessee.

r ~ 6/22/14