we always met in between lovers*

we were 16 and broken hearted
he hurt me and she left you
and somewhere in the pain
we found each other for a moment
we were always a moment
never to be more
but for that moment
we didn't want more

few years later and we found ourselves
someone else
and silence prevailed over our bond
and that was okay;
i never told him about you
you never told her about me
we didn't need to
we were a moment
a moment gone
a moment preserved
and those years, they passed
i lost track
of where you were or who you became

until
we met in between lovers

she couldn't be with you anymore
i couldn't be with him anymore
we came back with new stories
new heartbreaks to share
we came back with memories
that we couldn't bare
to lose
we came back with the need
to not be alone for a while
someone to hear the
silence of our words
and so we spoke
and we spoke
and found comfort that we would never be
we could never be
and that was what made it
so easy
and we spoke
about loss and love
and so i spoke
about how i missed his touch
and so you spoke
about the smell of her hair
and so i spoke
about the color of his eyes
and so we laughed
about that day when this happened
and so we cried
about that day when that happened
and we spoke.
and we spoke.
and we spoke.

we always met in between lovers
we would never be lovers
we didn't need to be.

few years down the line
i wonder if i'll see you again
and it's bittersweet
because meeting you
means i have lost another
and i wonder
why do we always meet
not as friends
but
brokenhearted
between lovers?

Instead of saying I love you,
I say let’s break up
Instead of saying I miss you,
I say let’s forget everything
My heart that keeps beating,
my tears that keep flowing
I’m sorry

I’m sorry for seeing her for the first time
I’m sorry for loving her
I guess you know me and
that’s why you’re hurting more
My passionate heart, I’m really sorry

I’m sorry for letting her go
I’m sorry for hating her
I guess you know me and
that’s why you’re sad again
My tears that are crying, I’m sorry

Instead of saying I love you,
I say let’s break up
Instead of saying I miss you,
I say let’s forget everything
The memories that I’ll miss
more as time goes by
Let’s erase it all
But still, I think of you
Because of this cruel and painful love
My heart that is still beating,
my tears that keep flowing
I’m sorry

My heart, my tears, my memories
Look for you again like a habit
One day, two days, three days pass but
I can’t do anything

Instead of saying take care, I say I love you
Instead of saying be happy, I say I miss you
Your eyes, your breath that
I miss more as time goes by
It fills me up

I’m sorry, I’m sorry,
I keep thinking of you
Because of this cruel and painful love
I don’t even think I can keep the promise
Of trying to meet someone else and being happy
It’s too hard, I don’t think I can do it

My heart that is crying again
My tears that keep flowing
I’m sorry

i'm not sure how to not feel like i've forgotten how to breathe
when i think of how you're having fun without me,
and the lost time you could be spending with me
wasted on other people.
it's selfish jealousy that riddles me with a heavy chest,
teary eyes, and it's pathetic.
but i love you to the point it hurts,
to the conclusion that i don't want anyone else in your presence.
but for now i'll stare silently at my wall,
trying to pretend i don't know you,
and trying desperately not to flood myself with
mindless wanting.
i miss you.
and i'm trying not to hate you for my own selfish reasons.

How strange it is to dream
That we could meet in-between
In some romantic scene
Existing outside reality
Living in a bubble world
A place where neither extremes meet
Where there is no soul deforming opulence
Or in comparison no division
That leads to chilling forms of poverty

If we could dance in love
Away from the ways of hate and greed
Fulfill the need to feed the hungry
Cure all the disease
And seed hope
For each generation after

If there was more laughter
And fewer tears
Till only natural sorrows remained here
What a sweet romantic world that would be

i believe in a story

               (it is my love)

the passing of my hands through light,
the coming of slight graces,
the bended stocks of mute flowers.

my love
you are without skin,
your eyes do not see,
your lips do not kiss.

my love
i love you–

         (and where

are you?

my love you
are the whole neatness
wishing within me

to feel the slight pressing
of heat beneath your skin;

the pulsed flexing of your vein
and hem. my love you are

the small darkness
and tiny quiet of my
heart to fill you kissing;

the crimped weakness of your knees,
the playing of your eyes after nightfall,
the winking fleetness of your cheeks.)

And, my love
are you

  where ?

(i can feel you)

even with space
between breathing
and heat between us;     my love

i can feel your someday lips
within my lips the
waxing of your palm
within my palm.

my love
(and i have always loved you)
will believe
in the story

of your hands and lips:

the passing of my hands through light,
the coming of slight graces,
the bended stocks of mute flowers.

you will feel a rattling in your bones
and ask yourself
did you want it to hurt?
you fell in love
so you could be an artist
didn’t you?
Trust me, i did not know how to create,
But when i met you I think I learned how.
I wanted to make a home in your bones because
the first time we kissed
i felt a million tiny little butterflies
fly up my stomach and out of my mouth
while their tiny footprints stained the skin on my lips
I felt you with me.
your soul stained my lips
And no matter how hard i try to wash it off
you still linger here.
I showed you your favorite band and now you show them her
You stain her lips
I lie alone in the dirt
I told you i loved you
But now i’m not so sure
I awakened your soul,
But you’re sleeping next to her.

i wish i didn't feel like I rhymed with you.
like two words supposed to be together
side by side,
in the same sentence,
or else in adjacent lines.
maybe even one apart,
for an alternate rhyme.

we at least belong in the same stanza
or even two consecutive ones,
separated by an empty line.
surely there's space enough for you and I
in the same poem, i'd imagine,
with only a few letters in between
serving as a distraction.
i'm sure the poet would see fit
to put us right by one another,
seeing how well you and I rhyme together.