my hands trembled as I walk
You asked me if we could talk
of course I said yes
I never loved you less

You asked me about the weather today
I think of words to say
I know this will end bad
This talk is going to be the reason why I'll be sad

"what are we to talk about?"
that is what I wanted to shout
But I kept silent
Pretending that it didn't bother me

"I'm sorry"
that was your first line
"It's not you It's me"
I have heard that before

I hugged you one last time
I cried that night
As I turn my back on you
I silently whispered "I don't wanna lose you"

we talked again these past few days
I then fell again in your stupid ways
I can't wait for everything to begin
As I lay in bed again

As I walk in corners of our school
I saw you with your friends sitting on a tool
You were laughing at what she said
I was shocked, My heart just bled

You saw me approaching you
"hey we we're just talking about you"
I smiled and pretend it was okay
Until she rolled her eyes and smirked in my way

As I lay in bed again tonight
I watched as the stars shine so bright
I cannot help but to agree
that we are not meant to be

Do your hands move like the flame of a fire
Twitching and itching to possibly inquire
About the state that your mind has fled
About a fascination with being dead

Does your chest open up like a cave
Dripping cold, like a still-living grave
Can you shout inside and hear the echo
Is it your own voice telling you to let go

Do your legs hold you hostage from sleep
Do they move so your thoughts don't get deep
Or are they moving to make noise with the sheets
So your ears and midnight silence will never meet

Is your face more of a house but not a home
Something seeming foreign to what you've known
A room in which you sleep but isn't yours
Impossible to tell the ceiling from the floor

Does your heartbeat jump to conclusions just like mine
Or is it calm and slow and steady all the time
Does it leap into your head and cause a scene
Or is it glued to the cavern's walls without a dream

I walked inside the room
All eyes on me
I noticed yours were warm
But I shrugged it off simply

I want to remember every bit of that day
The way you looked sideways
As if looking for someone
But I hid and act as if I was no one

You saw me sitting under a tree
You stared at me as if you really wanted me
You told me things that I wanted to hear
But why did you break my heart dear?

That day
You told me 'let's just run away'
But sideways you looked again
And mumured I don't want you more than just a friend

You are my first love
The one that God sent from above
You are my last love
The one I asked of

I am your first
I gave you the love that eased your thirst
I was your last
The loud melody that moved your music into blast

You were my first
My last
I was your first
But never your last

I adored the rain
Maybe because it helps me wash away the pain
I thinks it's because it calms me
I believe its because it helps me

I want to become a rainbow
I want to be the reason you smile after the sorrow
I want to take the pain away from you
Even if you don't want me to

I want to scream and shout your name
I want to curse for falling in your stupid game
I want you to realize that you are to blame
Why this little spark turned into flame