the clock is ticking off  one painful thousandth of a second at a time
i feel like alice chasing the rabbit
except you are the hole i'm falling through
if only time could stop
if only i could drop
the needle that you are
my drug
if only indulging
in hallucinogenic substances
would make it stop
the pain of you
the pain that's you
if only i could drop
the clock
and break it.
stupid alice, it's not a rabbit you're chasing
it's a maggot
and it's eating you
i
n
s
i
d
e
out

there's nothing beautifully
tragic about wanting to slit
your wrist open and drown
in your own blood
there's no one to wipe away
your tears and sing you a
lullaby while you fall asleep
in their arms
there's not going to be some
sort of miracle person that
will burst into your life and
take away all of the tragedy
and pain
you have to do it yourself
you have to pick yourself up
brush off your knees
save yourself